...but that's partly because I did massive situps and crunches on monday night after not having done any for oh, months years and my abs are tight sore. Seriously. You Will Laugh Your Ass Off. Caution, strong language.

Occupation: Girl - Troy in Fifteen Minutes
Excerpts:

Paris is practicing archery on a nice straw man nailed up to the wall. He hits bulls-eye after bulls-eye.

HELEN: Wow, I had no idea you were so good at this.

PARIS: Neither did I. Weird, isn't it? And I really want lembas now.

HELEN: What?

~~

ACHILLES: Briseis!

BRISEIS: Achilles!

PARIS: *shoots Achilles in the heel*

BRISEIS: NOOOOOO!

PARIS: *gets his Legolas on, shoots Achilles 15 more times*

BRISEIS: PARIS, NOOOOOOOOOO!

PARIS: OH MY GOD, I FINALLY DO SOMETHING GOOD AND PEOPLE STILL YELL AT ME!