TheSpark.com’s Death Test!
Mark your calendar or Palm V. You can expect to die on: August 1, 2068 at the age of 87 years old.
On that date you will most likely die from:
Cancer (30%)
Alien Abduction (14%)
Heart Attack (10%)
Alcoholism (9%)
Third Degree Burns (8%)
Contagious Disease (6%)
Homicide (5%)
Interesting stats from the DeathTest:
11053687 people have taken the DeathTest.
Of those, 54% were female and 46% were male.
The average life expectancy of test takers is 67 years.
10% of test takers have hairy nipples.
4% have had team sex.
8% work in the porn business.
And 189726 people claim to have leprosy.
Disclaimer: We, despite being proficient with the human anatomy, are not doctors. Keep that in mind before calling your lawyer as you’re clutching your left arm moaning “Damn you, Spark, Damn YOU!” on August 1, 2068, as you slip silently into the night.
Alright! 87, baby! Older than average. And in August! What more could you ask for? *whistles* other than being an elf, and thus immortal…