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September 29, 2003

Here's a good distraction

The Return of the King trailer is here! Go watch 2 and a half minutes of goodness. I have to admit the absurd font of joy that spouted from me after watching this the first time. Eeek! December 17th seems so far away!

Things are coming together for the apartment. We'll get gas and phone service soon so the place will actually be liveable wink I still have to figure out what to do for a bed though. I've had some experience with futons and I'm just not sure if I like them or not. Didn't have too good of a night's sleep...but if I take the mattresses from home then what happens if I want to visit my parents/they want to make my room a guest bedroom? Bah. Whatever. I need a dresser and a desk as well. Wonder where they'll go. And I want to buy some Legolas posters for decoration big grin and I'll have to think up a scheme! Whoo. Let's go spend some cash!



file under: lordoftherings , reallife

September 26, 2003

You probably noticed

that this page was missing most of the day. Or maybe you didn't, because this is your first visit to etoiline.com...in which case, welcome. Anyway, those of you who got to see the entire ugly structure behind the facade, I'm sorry. Most of you know that when you visit etoiline.com you're actually visiting etoiline.com/index.html. For some unknown reason, index.html and all single files not in a directory were deleted on my account (versus files in the Realm, which are in a different directory: etoiline.com/realm/index.php). I'm guessing it had something to do with my ftp being wonky earlier in the day, but luckily my host has archiving capability and I made use of it about three weeks ago. So yes, I'll lose some stuff, but luckily the whole site was not deleted. They are taking quite the sweet time to restore the archive, however. I hope they'll hurry up. I had to manually insert this index.html page...no big deal as the lovely blog is powered by greymatter and most of it's in another directory...but some of the links might be broken. If you find one, please please let me know, because I don't have an accurate list of files that are supposed to be on the server. Anyway. Go visit one of my other sites if this bores you wink or go read moonstone and give me feedback!



file under: webetcetera

September 25, 2003

Vampires, werewolves and elves

Well, saw Underworld with Jess last night. It was dark. And it was late, and the theater was near empty...but the sound was cool. It gives you the little shivers with the transformations...not quite as good as say, Anita Blake books, but eh. Books are always better with that. Some gripes, like the transformations were a little sloppy and you couldn't understand that Kraven guy (who did not look like he could *ever* be the leader of the vampires...and what's with that weird accent?). Odd that the vamps didn't seem to have too much of a fixation on blood, but maybe I've just been reading too many horror novels.

Not enough romance for my taste, but then again that's why I'm attempting to write Decadence. There were a couple parts when I was saying, eh? and then I wondered what happened to the blond vamp later in the movie...but it's so obvious that there is going to be a sequel, what with the way it ended, and indeed, empire online reported today that there is going to be a sequel. Well and good, I suppose. I'd probably see it again if I had people to see it with, just for the fact that it's vamp/werewolf. Makes me very in the mood to write more of my fic.

Jess thought it was going to be sort of anime-ish. Needless to say she was surprised. It's got some gore in it...but maybe I'm inured to it because it didn't bother me. Rather I laughed disbelievingly at the ickiness of it. Ah well.

Did I mention how it's a little odd to try to write a story with a character that's quite different than me? I mean, I'm never really angry, I don't have any werewolfish qualities...not that I know of anyway ;) and I'm certainly not in love with someone from the wrong side of the tracks who I'm supposed to hate. So that's my excuse for writing Decadence slowly.

And re: the elves...yes, I did go to the Renaissance Festival last weekend. My parents let me have the new van, which was an experience...never driven that far or that long before. Thank goodness for cruise control. We drove down saturday night and stayed at Jess' friend's new apartment, which was nice. Two cats and a very late night later, we got to the festival much later than planned, but ah well. I wore my Legolas outfit because above all I love comfort, and that tunic and frock, if badly sewn, are much more comfortable than a corset. Although I do think I look quite fetching in a corset. People apparently quite liked the outfit; I had several compliments like 'that looks familiar' or 'how elven' (from the people who work there, who, to stay in character, can't let on that they recognize Lego, as this particular representation is from a movie, which certainly didn't exist in that time period, but they have an entire fairy forest, so elves are quite welcome) and a few people asked where I got my vambraces. One man asked me where I got them and when I said I made them, he was quite surprised and said how he was getting married soon and he and his fiancee were having an elven theme. Now perhaps I should have offered my services, but I didn't really want to subject myself to painting more at work ;) And someone else liked the embroidery, which I always feel a little weird taking compliments on, because it's just machine sewing. Albeit machine sewing that took much time and effort, but I would never try to hand sew something like that. But yay. People liked the outfit. One of the workers even asked if I worked the fest, and I had to say no. I wish I did. Unfortunately KC is much to far away from StL to make it worth it. Perhaps someday...

It rained on us a little bit, but nothing so hard as to drive us away early. We shopped, watched some of the shows, and walked between the raindrops. I bought some perfume that I'd been wanting for some time (Voodoo Charm and Carnival, which you'll have never heard of unless you visit Majikah Perfumery) and some incense that I'll finally be able to burn at the new apartment since it will be free of the motherly indict against burning anything at home.

Of course, the rain got worse on the way home. Sometimes it was quite hard and then it became foggy, so visibility was crappy. We got home later than we wished and I didn't get to cruise nearly as much as I wanted to. but overall we had fun. Saw a sugar glider nestled in someone's cleavage. Some very funny shows, some very good shows, neat shops. More time would have been nice, perhaps getting there earlier, but ah well. There's always next year.

I think I'll go attempt to write some more of Decadence now.



file under: movies , muses , writings

September 24, 2003

The Realm is all around you

I am pleased to announce that the realm of calenhíril is completely finished! Well. All images work, the clique is up and running, the site has been nominated for some awards...so go visit. Join the clique. It's quite easy now wink

Someone asked me What did Gimli say to Haldir when he said "ishkhakwi ai durug nul"? Was that an insult of some kind? and I'll say, I believe that it was supposed to be an insult in dwarvish but I don't think there ever was any meaning to it. I remember the clip in one of the fotr SE archives or commentaries where John Rhys-Davies was talking about that part and how much trouble he had saying it...and how it didn't mean anything. Eh. Who knows. I'd have to watch FotR SE again wink

Someone else asked me my name, but unless you mean who I am, I can't help you there...unless of course you were looking for your elvish name, in which case I would direct you to BarrowDowns. Yet another person asked, will i find HIM? and to that I say, dear God I hope so. Of course, that means I have to find "him" as well. Come on, someone out there is tall dark handsome and elvish. And whoever asked simply 3x5 would just get that it is my favorite John Mayer song and everyone should go to my stupid mouth and see if anyone's got a live version available.

Go visit the realm. And for all those interested...I finished chapter six of The Moonstone Chronicles. If you've been reading it, you know what to do. If you haven't, go read it and if you feel the need to read farther than chapter four, contact me to get the password...

Still haven't heard about the apartment. Sigh. Ah well. Going home now...



file under: lordoftherings , webetcetera

September 23, 2003

Just so you know

I think I've fixed most of what's wrong with the Realm, again. Some pictures are still not showing up and I have no idea why...they've got direct links and everything. Ah well. But anyway, the clique is up and running, you just can't see the whole list, for some reason. So go join.

The Realm has been confirmed in the Middle Earth Awards and the Yummy-Lembas awards...yay! You can't vote for me in those, but you can go visit and see what they've got. Links are on the Realm index page.



file under: competition , webetcetera

Autumnal Equinox

Fall begins this afternoon at 5:45 pm. It's such a pretty day. Too bad I'll be inside working on an extremely long ELISA all day. I'll probably have to stay late again. Ah well.

Semi-peevish thing of the moment: they installed a gate on the parking lot that I park in at work. It took them quite a long time and then for at least two weeks (probably longer, I can't remember the exact date they went in) the gates were up and you didn't have to swipe your id to get into the lot. Yesterday they had them down and a transportation guy was watching to make sure people's ids worked to open the gate. Mine worked just fine, but it's a PAIN to have to stop and swipe and wait for the gate. It backed up traffic both ways. And of course you have to swipe to get out as well. Apparently having permits displayed in your car wasn't enough to discourage free parkers, so they needed the gates...but it's a bad idea, imo. And today they were open. Weird. Maybe they got too many complaints. Wouldn't that be nice.

I'm already hungry. Geez. Haven't been here a half hour yet. And the day stretches long before me...

hopefully today we'll hear about the apartment and it will be good news. Keep your fingers crossed. And here's mention about Leona who loves to see the apartment noted in the blog smile luff you!



file under: rants

September 22, 2003

111xhowever many years since the Third Age

It's Bilbo and Frodo's Birthday! Thank you Gabby for reminding me.

I am still at work. Bleah. And actually doing work. Or I shall be in five...four...three...two...one...



file under: lordoftherings

September 19, 2003

For all you elf-lovers out there

the realm of calenhiril is finally up and running again with a totally new layout and redesign of the site. It's php now so those pages shouldn't be such a bear to update. Clique members I'm sorry, I'm still trying to work on the clique part, I have to transfer all the members over and that's no fun. But I'll get it working sometime. And eventually that means I'll be able to finish the content sections of the main site, lol. Ah well.

But not this weekend. Looks like I'll be going to the renaissance festival with jess after all. We'll see. Early morning tomorrow if we do...and I've never driven that far before. We leave the driving up to my dad. Hopefully the 'rents will let me have a car with cruise control. Wish me luck...I've gotta get home and sew the rest of that skirt!



file under: webetcetera

Movin' out

Well, Leona and I turned in our applications for the apartment we saw yesterday. It's funny but of course you know my life is ironic...it was the last apartment we saw, it wasn't the one we were actually going to see cause that one was taken...and my aunt showed us the place. And it's nice to know someone in the biz cause the owner agreed to knock $100 off the rent it originally goes for. It's still more expensive than we wanted, but it's a great apartment. Stained glass entry doors, a sunroom, a nice living room (with a fireplace that doesn't work, but there's always candles) the bedrooms are the same size or thereabouts (and one has a bay window! Yay!) a nice bathroom with two sinks, and a new kitchen. There's a deck out back and in the center of all these buildings there's a community garden. And it's where we wanted it, close enough to both the Hilltop and the Med School...whoohoo.

So now we have to wait to see if the credit check goes through...might not, for me...I have no credit, really, unless you count me always paying my loans on time...but we should be able to move in late next week. Yay. Course, that means I have to a) clean up my room and figure out what's going with me and what I can trash and b) go shopping for things like dressers and bedframes. That should be exciting...not going to make any profit for the next couple of paychecks...

Underworld comes out today. In honor of this, you should read Decadence (what's up of it, anyway) and I swear I started writing that before I had any idea such a movie was being made.



file under: reallife

September 15, 2003

Wheel

I believe

that my life's gonna see

the love I give

returned to me

Courtesy of John Mayer. I just love this song. It's probably the best song lyrics-wise on the new album. I think this is true. Someday I'm gonna get back all I put into life, just like Emerson said. We get out of life only what we put into it.

and you won't be the first

no, you won't be the first

to love me

isn't it strange how everyone has that 'first love' and no one can ever make you forget that. Even today I wonder where he is and what he's doing and if he thinks of me. And even if he's alive. He was in the army reserves and I wonder if he was sent to the middle east. all his emails bounce. And I wonder if I'll be able to keep myself from comparing any other guy to his admittedly rather low standards.

and if you never stop when you wave goodbye

you just might find if you give it time

you will wave hello again

things just keep coming back. Today was the 150th anniversary of Washington University in St. Louis. Yay alumni. I got a keychain and a bookmark and free ice cream. Go Ted Drewes (It's a StL thing). It seems like whenever I leave a place they get money for renovations or new equipment...I should just sell my services. Take me into your institution and let me stay for a while...when I leave you'll get an endowment! From someone else of course. Anyway, they started working on the library to make it more modern and better suited to the campus...and they added a new lab sciences building the the very annoying new biomedical engineering building, Uncas A Whittaker hall. Poor Uncas. What were his parents thinking? That building was finished the December after I graduated. But there were still the classic buildings full of memories and horrors (eek! Louderman! Yay, Graham Chapel!) And there was Magic Mark Wrighton, the chemical chancellor wink Yes, an egg can fit in a flask, and you can break a rose into a million tiny pieces and hammer rubber through foam core. And Taiko drums are some of the coolest things ever. I should learn the drums. Of course, as Alex stated, I ought to stick to one instrument at a time given my propensity for long learning curves...and Leo and I looked at another apartment. I wish the process was faster. I wish we had unlimited funds. I hope we find one soon. Or at least one for Leo...

in airports you see it all the time

where someone's last goodbye

blends in with someone's sigh

cause someone's coming home

in hand a single rose

and that's the way this wheel keeps working now

that's the way this wheel keeps working now

We're seeing the Lion King again on Tuesday. The Circle of Life indeed. And in two weeks we'll finally learn why Sydney is in Hong Kong two years after she disappeared...

and now I'll sleep.

I'll be around the bend

I'll be around the bend

I'll be around

that's the way this wheel keeps working now



file under: muses , music

September 12, 2003

Heavier Things

Finally got the new john mayer cd! It's great as I expected. It'll be on repeat for a while...

\\so I'll check the weather wherever you are

Cause I wanna know if you can see the stars tonight

It might be my only right\\

-Split Screen Sadness

\\So fathers, be good to your daughters

Daughters will love like you do

Girls become lovers who turn into mothers

So mothers, be good to your daughters too\\

-Daughters

\\And if you never stop when you wave goodbye

You just might find if you give it time you will wave hello again

You just might wave hello again

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now

that's the way this wheel keeps working now

You can't love too much one part of it

You can't love too much one part of it

I believe that my life's gonna see

The love I give returned to me\\

-Wheel

Looked at a couple of apartments yesterday. Who knows what will come of that. It sure would be nice to have an apartment all to myself...er to me and my roommate. She needs one ASAP. We'll look more this weekend. Saw my uncle last night. He moved to a room out of the ICU but now they're trying to find a bed for him in another hospital so he can have some sort of procedure to find the bleeding. He was doing ok for a while but then he had to have another transfusion and he needs to be transfusion free for two weeks before this other procedure. Aie.

Thank Goodness it's Friday. This week has been too long. I need more sleep. Alas, back to work I go.



file under: reallife

September 11, 2003

a moment of silence.

I can't believe it's been two years. Amazing how things have changed...and things stay the same.

Always remember.



file under:

September 9, 2003

Hodgepodge

Playtarot -Playtarot Reader Go visit. Good for a laugh and to make you think. And I just bet you wish you had a cool toy like this.

I'm working on my Legolas layout as we speak...hopefully it will be done by the end of the week.

Kitt, I dl'd Bliss...I'll listen to it in a minute. We'll see if I can get any Pirates wink I've been listening to the soundtrack nonstop for the past few days...I'd really like to see it again. But absence makes the heart grow fonder... The new John Mayer cd comes out today, you know. You should go buy it. I'm waiting for mine...I'll probably get it tomorrow as the thing was still in transit the last time I looked. Ah well. You can't beat free shipping...in fact, the whole order was free because my auntie Carol was so nice to me for my birthday smile If only there was such a thing as free *fast* shipping. Meh.

Onto lunch, folks...

side note: my uncle has now had nearly a person's worth of blood pumped into him. Bleeding is bad. Keep praying.



file under: miscellany , serious

September 8, 2003

Who cares if it's late?


From Sara

Thanks, dear. I'm glad you understand.



file under: celebration

what a way to spend the weekend

something I forgot to mention previously...finally was able to get a scanner off ebay, and it arrived in prompt fashion, but was apparently damaged in transit, and of course I didn't have insurance on it, didn't think about it/didn't figure I'd need it. That is always the way. That is my life. Some piece that kept the scanning mechanism on track and level was broken. I found this out when I tried to scan something the first time...the scanner bar went down as it should but then could not return because one side had come out of line and when the mechanism tried to come back the bar jammed. So I got a prescan of the latest Orli-as-Will-Turner drawing I did last month, but then the thing jammed so we're out of a scanner again. I'm waiting to hear from the guy if I might get any money back. I don't really expect to, as it wasn't his fault at all (or at least I'm willing to believe that the guy wouldn't sell me something that was broken already), but maybe he'll feel generous. Eh.

I also got invited to play in a softball game with a coworker's team. It was quite fun, made more interesting given the fact that it's been at least four years since I picked up a bat and glove...I used to be on a team in middle school and we played the obligatory few games in high school PE. The main reason I was good for the team was I could run fast... so if I was lucky enough to not strike out (mainly through the un-stellar skills of the pitcher--I walked much more than I ever hit or tried to hit the ball) I would be able to either a) make it to first base because the throw was too slow to get there before me or b) get on first somehow and then steal a couple of bases to be in scoring position by the time someone with hitting skills came up to the plate. Anyway, present tense...I actually managed to hit the ball each time I went up, and made it to at least first base each time...yay beating out the throw! But I only made it to third twice...not my fault the team I was playing with wasn't exactly the greatest ;) We lost, which meant the end of season 'tournament' didn't last very long for us...ok by me because I actually had to get home and head to the hospital to see my uncle. The game was made even shorter by the fact we played double innings...you'd bat for three outs then another three and then you'd switch to fielding. A little odd, and it's a coed league so some of the rules are a little weird, but hey, it was something active. I need more of that in my life. They asked me to come back next season :) We'll see. They play thursday nights (!) Everything is on thursday nights. This, most of the tv shows I like to watch during the week, SCA meetings (which of course I've never gone to, but I'd like to)... meh. Of course, today I'm terribly sore and that bugs me no end. I keep telling myself I should work out...and then I don't. Where is my motivation? Scratch that. I know what my motivation is. I'm just to lazy to act on it. I can still fit into my jeans, after all.

So, before this post degenerates into a self-pity exposition, I'll go back to reading the UK GQ article on Orlando and then go to sleep, me and my achy body. See you tomorrow.



file under: getmoving

September 7, 2003

I never could cry

My uncle spent the weekend in the ICU. He's still there. They're going to transfer him to Barnes or SLU hospital to see if a radiologist can find the source of some internal bleeding. My aunt and cousin came in from Joplin and my grandparents made the trip from Richland. It was tough on them to make the trip...my grandpa's hip has been hurting for a while and my grandma has had a headache for three days. Aunt Carol and Corey were coming up anyway for the St. Louis Art Fair, so they brought my grandparents up. We all visited at various times during the weekend, and you could just see when my uncle was in pain. It hurts to see someone you love in pain. Makes you wonder why it happens.

Thing is, obviously this is hard on everybody. Little things make people start to cry. Like Corey and I noticed that my Aunt Roberta's (Uncle Johnnie's wife) brake light was out. Aunt Carol had just told us how my cousin Tim had just bought his first car battery and installed it and his car is working again, and Aunt Roberta said, Oh, I'll have to have John get that light fixed...and you know, everyone tears up. Even Nick, stoic Nick, little cousin Nick who's now the tallest in the family, and looks just like his daddy John did at that age. And I can't summon a tear. I feel bad that I can't cry. I don't know why. You might have read about how I teared up at the Lion King musical. That was HIGHLY unusual. I mean, of course I'm sad. Of course I feel the pain of someone I love being sick. But I guess I can't show it. I can comfort, I can hug, but no tears will fall...and it's not like I'm trying not to cry. It might be nice sometimes. Makes me feel callous not to.

Dear God, don't take him from us yet. We need him.



file under: serious

September 5, 2003

Unwell

There are only a few of you out there that know this, but my uncle has cancer. He didn't find out for sure until about a month ago when his stomach felt so bad he couldn't eat. By the time they checked it the cancer was very advanced (stage IV) and had spread to other areas. He's fighting it as he can, but they can't do surgery. I think he was going to have chemotherapy but I'm not sure there weren't some complications with that as well.

But we got a call this morning that he'd been rushed to the hospital last night because he felt so sick...and he's still there. I don't know what's happening because callous as it sounds, I had to get to work. My cousin is staying home from school today. My mom was crying on the phone.

I don't know what to do, how to feel. I don't want to think of him dying, because that would be pessimistic and I try not to be. I want him to stay with us. His family needs him...we need him. But I don't want to be totally unprepared for shock. People don't die in our family...at least, no one I'm close to has yet. I don't want a trend to start. Prayer is a good place to start, I suppose. But then I get into that 'am I right with God' feeling that always makes me uncomfortable. Sheesh. I don't think there's a comfortable way to feel about this.

He got those tickets to the Lion King because he was working for someone who found out he was sick. Usually I love irony, but not this much.



file under: reallife , serious

September 3, 2003

Showing spirit

Fantasy Fights Spirit Wand
Send a Spirit Wand!

Thanks, Alicia wink

I really need to work on my Legolas site. I'm itching to add all the new members to the clique! lol.



file under: webetcetera

September 2, 2003

Egad. I am still at work.

But this allows me to find hilarious things like this story on FanFiction.Net...you must read it, but here's an excerpt from the Will Turner: Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual...

Q: I recently lent my WILL to a friend in Cambridge, England. When she eventually gave him back, he was wearing blue contact lenses, a long blond wig and prosthetic ears. He walked in, laid one hand upon his heart, bowed slightly and said, �Elen s�la l�menn�omentielvo!� What on earth can I do?

A: Well, for a start you can stop lending him out to other people, you fool! The programming of your WILL has been seriously damaged by your so-called "friend's" treatment of him. The "Hero" section of his functionality will still be intact (or even enhanced) but when faced with enemies, he will no longer trip them up with a piece of rope in an engagingly amusing fashion, but will instead seize a couple of bread knives, scream Elbereth!and perform a murderous dance of deadly grace, severing limbs and trepanning skulls until he is bloody to the elbows. If you wish to prevent such occurrences, carefully remove the contact lenses, throw away the wig and ears, wash off any pale make-up, put a large, plumed hat on his head and read him a few chapters of Treasure Island. It will not be long before your WILL is once more shouting "Avast!" and clambering around your rigging.



file under: orlando