Happy St. Pat's.

Being that it's a Monday it's unlikely that I'll be able to do any actual partying, but I'll lift my virtual green beer just the same.

And for your Irish edification: An A to Z of Irish Culture, courtesy of author John Scalzi, who is a funny guy and you should read his stuff anyway.

file under: celebration , education Posted by Jen at 9:36 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Here is a public service reminder from et dot com: if it's snowy/icy/sleety outside, DO NOT try to drive fast. I know I complain that St. Louis drivers get no respect (I've never been in an accident that I caused) but seriously, folks. Do yourself a favor and slow down. Turn your headlights on (which is LAW if your wipers are on).

As my roommate says, there are three things you need to worry about when driving in wet/snow conditions. You can accelerate, stop, or turn, but only one at a time. She should know, because she's from Ohio. Be safe out there. Hope the weather clears before it's time to go home...

  the ping of sleet hitting the window

file under: education Posted by Jen at 9:50 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I just sent off my med school application, and paid an entirely outrageous amount of money for it. Let's see what happens next...

hopefully this was not an inauspicious day to do so.

file under: education , serious Posted by Jen at 7:19 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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"I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much." - Mother Teresa

I'm working on the AMCAS, the medical school common application. Egad but it's an odd thought to think this time next year I could be in med school. Entertaining, really, since I don't feel like I have much of a chance, but it's nice to dream. I keep finding things I need to do for it, things to get...maybe I'm getting ahead of myself. I've already promised myself that I would use my savings to pay fo the app fees. My GOD but they're expensive.

But as someone at a med student forum pointed out, I have zero chance of getting in if I don't try. Slim is better than none. Of course, there are also people on there who talk about applying to 25 (yes, twenty-five) schools. That's nearly a thousand dollars just to say, Hey, I'm interested in your school. Oy.

Think I'll pray now.

  John Mayer, Clarity (ironic, no?)

file under: education Posted by Jen at 12:26 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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MCAT scores came out today. No, I won't tell you what I got, except to say that I did better than last time.

But.

I don't feel great about them. I had hoped for a little more elevation in score. It's nice to see that what I studied the hardest did indeed show the greatest improvement. But I actually went down in something that I thought would have been easier due to the classes I was taking. At least my writing is better. Given my luck, the median score will go up with mine, and I'll be exactly mediocre...again.

I guess it's possible that I might get in with those scores. But then it's equally possible that I would do much better in physical therapy. Course, I would have to take the GRE again. Sigh.

On the upside, I'm definitely joining the Browncoats. (Watch out, long one.)

A friend (I guess he's still a friend, just a friend) finally got me to watch the tv show Firefly, which was created by Joss Whedon, of Buffy and Angel fame. I remember when it came out, and recall being a little turned off by the "space western" theme. Westerns aren't my thing. It also wasn't on air very long; Fox, being the strange entity that it is, cancelled it after 11 episodes. But it gained a cult following, and now I can see why.

It's a lot of fun, very clever and funny in a lot of parts. Unfortunately my first exposure to a lot of the actors in the show was when they made guest spots on Buffy or Angel, and I didn't like their characters, so I didn't particularly want to see them in anything else. But they won me over. It's pretty amazing, the story they were able to tell in so short a time. I do wish there was more.

But wait! There is more! There's a movie, Serenity, for which, serendipitously enough, I just had a Border's coupon. It was only $10. Whee! So back on the 10th, after some rather disappointing news, I took myself to Best Buy and bought the entire series of Firefly , the tv soundtrack...and a digital piano.

We now interrupt your journaling for a rather odd story.

I was pretty upset by the disappointing news, so I decided to pick up Firefly to make myself feel better. Best Buy had the cheapest retail price, so I went there. On a whim, I took at look at their digital pianos. I'd seen good reviews for one of them, and since I was not feeling so hot, decided to buy it too. *bank account cringes*

I figured I should check out Circuit City, just across the way, which sometimes has better prices, or Border's to see if they had Firefly for less. I trekked to those places, fruitlessly, and so headed back to Best Buy. By this time the weather, previously hot and sunny, turned grey and prepared to rain. If I hadn't taken the price check trip, this wouldn't have bothered me, but...

Back at the store, I asked someone to help me get the box up to the register (88-key pianos are quite large, you know?) and was waiting for an associate when the power went out. Now, it's odd enough when the power goes out in your home or whatnot, but in a big store like that it's so weird to go from bright glaring light to the little illumination of emergency lights. Apparently whenever the power's out at a store like this, all the computers reboot and upload things, which takes a pretty long time, and we had to wait until they finished. Slowly appliances came back on, tvs started showing their loops, and one by one, the lights came on. I would guess it was less than 10 minutes until power was restored, but it's quite eerie to be in a place that's normally so bright when it's just half-lit.

Of course I had to ask for help again, and when I finally got checked out and ready to head to the car, it decided to start pouring. Big fat drops, too. I managed to get the sturdy box into the car (not without trouble and much wet) and home, and no damage to either. However...

My car has a sunroof, installed by the previous owner. DO NOT get a sunroof installed in your car unless it comes factory-installed! They leak anyway, but third-party sunroofs are awful for it. Admittedly it might have gotten a little off kilter when that silly person rear-ended me three years ago, but this is insane. I think the rain has to be in a certain direction and coming down for a long enough time, but for two days after that torrential storm the front seats were soaked. Not a pleasant feeling to sit down on one of those! I can't figure out where the drain tubes are, either, so I can't check to see if they're clogged. Eventually the car dried out. All good, until the next storm.

Anyway, back to the story. I finished the last few episodes of Firefly on Saturday and watched Serenity later in the afternoon. I wish I hadn't had to watch it alone. It would have been better with the friend. Sigh. The day was good, overall, having brunch with Ross and picking up a MIDI interface and an Apple Jam Pack so my piano can connect to my computer and make symphonic melodies. Then it was home for Father's day. Good times. My finances don't like me, but I'm pretty content, considering the middling MCAT scores and being tired today from an early study.

Guess it's back to it. Thank goodness for heading to Champaign this weekend.

Oh, I have a new roommate. She's nice, but v. young. I might have to teach her a few things about living in an apartment, once I've gotten over paying the newly-raised rent. I'll try to be better about writing here. Sometimes it's just not something you can put into words.

I'm rather amazed you went this far. Leave me a comment to show you care, eh?

  California Baylor, Elizabethtown soundtrack
  rereading Prophesy, Elizabeth Haydon
file under: education , muses , music Posted by Jen at 10:42 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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If you've read this journal recently, you know I just finished a class in anatomy and physiology. One of my regrets (this makes me sound morbid) was that we didn't get to see actual human cadavers for our human A&P class. (We did get to spend some quality time with some dissected cats, though.) However, if you went to a science museum showing this exhibit, you'd see that and more...it's creepy but I think it would be really interesting. And the tech behind it (yes, there is tech to exhibiting preserved specimens) is interesting too. So perhaps I need to go to Denver or St. Paul this summer...I'm such a dork, that something at a science museum would make me want to travel more than just your typical sightseeing...

BODYWORLDS-

It's freaky in a cool way.

*We now intterupt your regularly scheduled (or not so regular) journal entry for this fangirl message: *
Renaissance festival! X-Men 3! This weekend! *end fangirl message*

  Different, Acceptance

file under: education Posted by Jen at 10:37 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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In far too short a time, I take the MCAT. Again. I did a little studying today, but I felt pretty good when I was actually getting the answers to the physics parts before I looked up the answers. I suppose time will tell, and I might fail miserably. But at least I can say I tried.

I hope it will go well. I'm a longshot in any case, why should this be any different?

  Farewell, Children of Dune sdtk

file under: education Posted by Jen at 12:05 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Don't try to solve serious matters in the middle of the night.
- Philip K. Dick

So it's Thursday night and the MCAT is Saturday. Imagine my joy. No pressure or anything, and I don't feel all that prepared. My practice test scores have not been encouraging, even though I've supposedly been through all of this before. Of course, it doesn't help when the book of practice exams gives you the wrong formula Problem is, if that actually happened on the real test, I most likely wouldn't realize it.

At least I have Friday off. I can sleep in (you know, to five minutes past when I would normally wake up anyway, what with all these recent early mornings) and have lunch with the 'rents. Though wouldn't you know it, the Thurtene Carnival (the oldest student-run fair in the country) is this weekend. Joy. I get to take a test while people are frolicking around me. Yeah. Hopefully I won't have trouble getting a parking space.

Thanks to all of you who wished me well. Though apparently I didn't make it clear exactly when the test was, since I've had quite a few people think I'd already taken it (a second time, that is). I will need all the help I can get, once again. Pray that all those silly little equations that they swear you don't really need to know will manage to stay in my head, because by golly, you sure do need to know how to find the buoyant force of a balloon...

I know I'm not going to be as prepared as those who took a class (do you have a spare $1600 floating around?), which galls me, sort of. I know that I can/could do well, but I'd do better if I had the information drilled into me. It's sort of something that I am pretty sure I can get on my own, but I'm...not...quite...there. I'm depending on my newfound (or just newly remembered) knowledge of human anatomy to help me out with the biological section, but it's the physical sciences section that just kills me. Every time. No matter how many stupid falling projectile problems (among others) I do, there always seems to be a part of the section that trips me up so I can't figure out anything else for that part. Sigh.

Wonder if I'll remember any organic chemistry? or optics, magnetics, fluid flow...one day, I will have to have someone tell me when I'm going to need to know how fast a frictionless cart rolls down a ramp when it starts from rest.

Wish me luck.

  For Good, Wicked, Original Cast Recording

file under: education Posted by Jen at 11:35 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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It's tough working and taking a class, however easy this one might sound. Got a lab practical in just about an hour, and I'm not quite ready for it...and we've been quite busy at work, which is crazy. I get home and I just want to sleep.

When am I supposed to be able to write the great debut novel? sigh.

On the fun side, a book that wasn't supposed to be out until next week is now in my hot little hands, and already read since last night. Alright, it was a really short book, but hey, it's Anita Blake. I tear through those. Thanks to Barnes and Noble for having it early. No thanks to any of the bookstores in town for not having up-to-date MCAT study books. Not that I really need a new one, since I barely got through the ones that I had last year, but I would like an update, you know? sigh.

Wish me luck on the test. I'll be glad when this is over. Joyeux Mardi Gras, if I don't see you...anyone want to come party with me this weekend?

  Pocahontas and Smith, The New World soundtrack (James Horner)

file under: books , education , working Posted by Jen at 3:47 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I signed up for the MCAT again. In a little over two months, I'll subject myself to eight hours of hell. Again. All for that nebulous goal of medical school.

Don't get me wrong. I *think* I want to be a doctor. (Rousing endorsement for my self-esteem, I know.) But geez, the hoops to jump through to get there. That and the $210 it costs to take the damn test. Why oh why can't I be independently wealthy?

If by some miracle I make it through this, I'll have to finish a book before I go into debt up to my eyeballs (and beyond, really). That way I could have some sort of cushion to live on, you know, assuming that people would actually *like* what I write...

Must buckle down and study like the bookworm that I am. If you don't see me online for the next two months, you'll know why. But feel free to send me encouraging messages. I will treasure them always.

  Joan Osborne, St. Teresa
  furiously reading A Feast For Crows before a) it's due at the library and b) before immersing myself in the physical sciences of the MCAT
file under: education Posted by Jen at 1:22 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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So I had my first A&P test last night. The prof gives us two answer sheets, one for him and one to keep, and he puts out the answer key right after the test. And I checked said answer sheet, and unless I mis-circled an answer on the turned in answer sheet, I got all of them right. Hot damn! I think that might be the first aced college test I ever had. Hopefully the rest of the class will go so well. Will have a take-home test in lab this week and then a practical next week. The overall grade is the average of the class and the lab...so far doing much much better in lecture than lab, which is odd, b/c usually it's the other way 'round for me.

(we'll just forget about the part where I was too sick to study for this test, shall we?)

And GO CARDS! They won the first game of division play, though it got tense at the end. Went from an 8-0 shutout to an 8-5 win with the tying run at bat...but yay. Let's go Cardinals!

  Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire for the (at least) 6th time
file under: celebration , education Posted by Jen at 5:20 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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  Magna Canta: Sanctuary

file under: education Posted by Jen at 3:21 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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What we truly and earnestly aspire to be, than in some sense we are. The mere aspiration, by changing the frame of mind, for the moment realizes itself. -- Anna Jameson

Sooo...the MCAT is tomorrow. Scary proposition, that. From the practice tests I've taken it's pretty clear that I won't do all that well. Alas. My mom points out that no matter how I do my parents will still love me and I can always take it again, but I'd sure like to get it over with. It seems a silly thing to have all med school dreams pinned on a test, but I don't know how else they would evaluate you. What I want to know is, am I really going to need to know how fast a ball is falling when dropped from 20 meters at ten seconds into the fall for med school?

Appropriate, perhaps, that this was my word of the day for Wednesday (don't know what happened to Thursday's. apparently Thursday was wordless.):

Word of the Day for Wednesday August 17, 2005

dilatory \DIL-uh-tor-ee\, adjective:
1. Tending to put off what ought to be done at once; given to
procrastination.
2. Marked by procrastination or delay; intended to cause
delay; -- said of actions or measures.

I am inclined to be dilatory, and if I had not enjoyed
extraordinary luck in life and love I might have been
living with my mother at that very moment, doing nothing.
--Carroll O'Connor, [1]I Think I'm Outta Here

And what is a slumlord? He is not a man who own expensive
property in fashionable neighborhoods, but one who owns
only rundown property in the slums, where the rents are
lowest and the where the payment is most dilatory, erratic
and undependable.
--Henry Hazlitt, [2]Economics in One Lesson
_________________________________________________________

Dilatory is from Latin dilatorius, from dilator, "a dilatory
person, a loiterer," from dilatus, past participle of
differre, "to delay, to put off," from dis-, "apart, in
different directions" + ferre, "to carry."

I have been dilatory about studying for said test. Wish me luck. I will need it.

(On a totally non-related note, Roswell Season Three is out on DVD. Awww, the last season of my favorite tv show. I may just have to get it today, on prinicple. I miss that show.

file under: education Posted by Jen at 9:24 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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...because I just signed up for the MCAT in August. There goes $200. Ugh. I decided to do it today because I got paid and I might as well do it now before I lose my nerve. It's probably not so good to feel so wishy-washy about going to med school. I think I will do well, but it's scary! And I don't know exactly what I would do yet...possibly something neuro-related, but I don't know how comfortable I'd feel cutting into someone's brain. But all that neurophysiology/ethology that I did in school (well, took classes for, anyway) was quite interesting and it would possibly let me do research on Alzheimer's or Parkinson's, which my mom tells me I should do. And wouldn't it be great to be the person who finds a cure. Or even part of a cure. I must admit to a certain amount of influence from 'er' and 'grey's anatomy.' And while I know that real life is not like a tv show, I still think those are interesting enough, once you strip away the soap opera.

Then there's the sports medicine/exercise physiology part, which is not so much med school as grad school. But then there would probably be the chance for working with prosthetics or orthotics, possibly getting back into the athletic swing of things...

and there's still that little voice saying, really, you sucked in college so why are you even attempting this? I still wonder if the three years of working will be worth anything. *is full of self-doubt* I would love it so much to get in here at Wash U but that's such a reach. Why couldn't I have fallen in love with a nice inexpensive public school? Noooo, I had to go for one of the most expensive schools in the region. It's sort of scary to think about, what might happen in a year...

I suppose a year from now I'll know if I'll still even be in the state. I will admit a certain apprehensiveness on my part about leaving "home." Because while I value my independence, I really like being near my parents and the things I've known all my life. What can I say? I'm an only child, and I was loved, so I never had to fight for things, didn't feel the need to strike out on my own. That and the fact that both my parents are super cooks.

Guess I should really start studying, huh. Too bad the MCAT book isn't nearly as exciting as A Storm of Swords. Oy. I'm doomed. *crosses fingers that I'll get the Wash U section on Test Day*

Jen N's wedding tomorrow! *crosses toes that a cute available guy is there*

  Celtic Woman is in my cd player, but I haven't listened to it yet today.

file under: education , serious Posted by Jen at 4:06 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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And finally, Orgo is over. I know I did ok in my lab class, though I wish I could get my last paper back. I guess I could email the prof about it...it'd be interesting to see if I actually made any coherent thoughts during that crazy writing. I don't know about the grade in the lecture. I know that I was farther down the scale than I thought I was, and while I know I didn't perform spectacularly on the final, there were at least things that I did know...hopefully more than things I didn't. But at least I can breathe again. No more classes at night, no more labs saturday mornings, at least for a little while. I suppose I might take some classes later, but nothing now.

Although now I get to start studying for the MCATs...and find a new job. Luigi's saying that someone else in the department might be interested in me, but that I've got to spend less time on the computer. Makes me sad. Seems to be a trend. Wish I knew how to be better dedicated to things other than those that make me happiest. If you find out, tell me how.

I really want a boyfriend right about now. Someone to hold me and tell me that it will be alright. Sure, either of my parents would do that and they are both wonderful loving people, but...just not the same. I'm just a little lonely, I guess. And worried. Stressed. Unsure. Slightly less so now that orgo is over, but still...damnit here I go quoting John Mayer, again:

I'm so tired of being alone, so hurry up and get here

On a happier note, forgot to mention that I saw Kingdom of Heaven again last night, after the test. Worked out quite well, really, my dad picked up Stroke of Midnight from the library for me yesterday, swung by after the test and got to have pizza and watch the HBO First Look for KOH, then headed over to Ronnie's 20 and the big screen. I would have been on time had I not stopped for popcorn, but I think they jumped the gun and actually started the movie exactly when they said they would, or they started the previews way early, since I was only a few minutes late into the theater, but already a few minutes into the movie. ah well. Not like I hadn't seen it before, and missing two minutes at the beginning doesn't take too much away from it

I'm glad I got to see it again, for a few reasons. You could appreciate the dialogue more, now that you knew what they were saying. Some of the lines that weren't clear the first time became clear. There was time to look at other things (other things than Orlando! Hah!). The screen was bigger, so that was nice, and the sound was good too, though the theater was next to another that was showing something with explosions so that didn't always mesh with what was going on onscreen. Unfortunately there weren't very many people there, but it was a Wednesday night at 10:20, so I guess that's not all that unusual. Stayed through the entire credits...apparently they used music from Blade II and a couple of pieces by Graeme Revell which surprised me. I have no idea where they were used, but perhaps Alex will let me borrow his Blade movies someday and I'll be able to pick it out. Seems odd that they didn't use all original music, but maybe they were in a hurry. Though the music doesn't sound like it.

I want to go back and see it again. I do like it, just not some parts of it, and I guess I'm quite picky with the editing. Here's hoping that the dvd will at least be a director's cut or somesuch, because there is a lot that got left out. But man, it's nice to stare at Orlando's bare stomach on the big screen. I need a guy.

  Stroke of Midnight, Laurell K Hamilton. Finished in less than 24 hours. Entirely too short.
file under: education , orlando Posted by Jen at 3:49 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Soon the stress will be over. One paper, one final, and one hopefully nice premiere.

Things in St. Louis to do before I die. Other cities, too. Realized that I've only done one out of the five. Well, two, but I don't remember the one, so I don't think it counts. Where has the time gone?

Slightly freaked out about the orgo paper due tomorrow. Am hoping to leave early so I can catch the tail end of time at the chemistry library, which, in wonderfully ironic fashion, closes at 5 on fridays instead of the 10 pm it closes on every other day of the week. bugger.

  Kingdom of the Grail
file under: education Posted by Jen at 12:39 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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When you encounter difficulties and contradictions, do not try to break them; bend them with gentleness and time. --St. Francis de Sales

Yes, well, my contradictions and difficulties could cost me points on my orgo lab grade. boo. So you've heard me gripe about the orgo lab before, how we have to identify some unknowns, a hydrocarbon, an amine, and a carbonyl. So the hydrocarbon we just had to say, yup, this is a hydrocarbon, and that's it. The other two I have narrowed down to two choices, and supposedly the extra spectral data we got last week was supposed to definitively identify one compound. Well. Sort of. I *think* I know what I've got, but I have (heh) contradictory evidence that says, no, really you don't. Bugger. And I still have to write this paper, whether I have the right answer or not. House of cards, if there ever was one. All balancing on the hope that I choose the right set of data to believe.

At least I have the really cool Making of Kingdom of Heaven to keep me happy. Reading it while the soundtrack is playing is just too good for words. Better than orgo lab, anyway. (and in case you were wondering...the orgo test went...okay. Better than the last test, which was almost an utter bomb, but if I did better then most of the class probably did better. Guess we'll see.)

  
file under: education Posted by Jen at 5:26 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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why is it that even though it's a five page paper, it seems just as hard to write as a twenty page?

why is it that they don't give you the connecting cable for a printer anymore? What about those of us who donated the printer back home to the 'rents and therefore had neither printer nor cable? Boo.

Why is it that simple pieces of audio accessories keep breaking on me? Today I pulled off my headphones and the one earpiece just broke off. wtf? Not even at a break point. Boo. So I guess I'll be getting some more of those tonight.

Note to self: Pick up issue 190 of Empire, which has what promises to be a massive Kingdom of Heaven overview. Whee!

file under: education Posted by Jen at 4:35 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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When orgo texts try to be funny while warning you of the dangers of working with organic substances:
Like most heavy metals, thallium is highly toxic and should not be used on breakfast cereal. Wow. I would never have guessed.

there's an orgo test today. not too much more in my life other than that. well, other than the team I was semi-rooting for last night in the Super Bowl once again lost. Seems like whatever team I pick loses, except for that one year when I couldn't watch it because I was a good girl and stayed in my room to write a report or paper or somesuch stupid computer program. Then the Rams won. My grandmother thinks it's horrible that I think I might have such a power over things, which I know I don't, but it's sure the way it seems like...

so, wish me luck on the orgo test. I'll need it.

I can't wait until I can start knitting a matching scarf for my hat...perhaps I'll get it done before it starts getting truly warm around here, lol.

  Josh Groban: O Holy Night (from Live in Concert)

file under: education Posted by Jen at 3:22 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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(we interrupt this blog to bring you an important message: Halleluja, the Half-Blood Prince is on the Horizon! JK Rowling has finally finished Book 6 of the Harry Potter series. Now we only have to wait for July 16 of next year. Sigh. What I wouldn't give to have her successes. Back to your not-so-regularly scheduled blogging.)

I nearly want to cry. I have consigned myself to four and half months with no vacation, aside from spring break...sigh. I signed up for the second semester of Orgo today, and its attendant Saturday-at-8-freaking-AM lab. *wails* Not that I'm taking much vacation as it is, but I have totally destroyed any chances of a weekend trip until summer. Which is ok, I guess, since summer was always the plan for New York...right, Lell?

Speaking of Lell and by extension NaNo, I really need to finish Artorius Rex Novare. I still have the ideas, don't get me wrong. And I find it funny how my best grade on an orgo test happened while I was combining studying and writing like a fiend. Huh. Still don't know what the final grade was, it won't be posted until Christmas, I don't think. *crosses fingers that there's a big curve*

but on a happier note: I finally got my Extended Edition of RotK from the parents. Even though I had been out late partying with coworkers for a going-away/Christmas party, I had to watch a bit of the first disc. And the easter egg...OMB, it was hilarious! Can't wait to watch the rest, and drool over the little Legolas tidbits they offered us slobbering fangirls.

(side note: Apparently B. Dalton Booksellers are going out of business, at least in the mall near my house, which is really sad, because they've been there forever, it seems. On the upside though, everything in the store is 40% off. Yay cheap books.)

You know that Toyota commercial with the tire rolling by "scenes of life," or however you'd describe it? Yet another example of a car company with a good commercial. The music was written especially for the spot, by a band you might know...that is, if you were a fan of Roswell, like me...Fisher wrote the short song which you can download from a link on their website. I love the Fisher songs I've heard, but dislike their connection to Roswell...it was part of the whole Max/Tess thing that I have to admit was beautifully filmed but made the Dreamer in me want to gag. Ahh, Roswell nostalgia.

  Dave Matthews Band: Two Step

file under: education Posted by Jen at 2:13 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Man, I can't believe I made it through that orgo test. It had 'fake' multiple choice where you still had to do most of the work and some reaction questions and mostly stuff I didn't know, which is silly and absurd given that I've spent the last four months griping about orgo. Sigh. It's not nice. We'll get our grades online soon, but the actual tests won't come back until next semester's class starts. Silly teacher, thinking we want to take the next section of orgo. Sigh. I guess it might be good for me someday, but all I can say now is, Dear God let there be a big curve.

Shortly I'm going to head out and possibly hit the mall to pick up King Arthur and maybe Daredevil Director's Cut. And did you know that it's the 40th anniversary of Mary Poppins? lol. And then I'm going (FINALLY!) pick up my RotK dvd yay! LotR goodness! sigh. I'm such a fangirl.

  Keane: Somewhere Only We Know

file under: education Posted by Jen at 3:48 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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So, the test is finally over. Thank goodness I don't have to carry around my orgo books for at least two weeks. Ugh. I think I'm going to have back problems from this class. I actually weighed both the orgo book and the solutions manual...together they only weigh 10 pounds, but carrying that extra ten pounds every day is a bitch. Ah well.
I know there were some stupid things I missed because I just couldn't think of them...I even wrote down the steps for it, I just couldn't think of the reagents needed. I could kick myself, if I could. Er. Hopefully I'll get full credit on a few of the questions. Ah, the joys of partial credit.
And on the NaNo front: I have reached 13,000 words, which sounds like a lot, but we're close approaching the 15th of Nov when theoretically I should be halfway finished. Eh. Not failing orgo is a higher priority than finishing the novel. But I think I might actually be able to do both. Who knows? I do think it's coming along quite well, but I have to try to figure out how it's going to end. I need an ultimate goal for the characters, you know? What would *you* have a boy who learns he's King Arthur reborn do? In modern times. Yeah. Not so original, but it's fun to write. It's definitely tending towards the fantastic side. I don't think I can write reality, unless it's on this blog.
I'm happy because tonight I can go home and actually *watch* tv instead of taping it, hoping to watch the shows later. I'll probably never get around to seeing all the shows I have on tape right now. A little over two weeks worth, I think. Oy. But I'll have my laptop set up out there in the living room, so hopefully I'll get something done. Yay for upping the word count! I'd post an excerpt, if I were on the comp that had it.
And hopefully MT will let me post this. Some days I hate technology.

  Switchfoot: Dare You to Move

file under: education Posted by Jen at 5:47 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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...when the test is over. I feel like I've been under a lot of stress lately and it just hasn't gone down. On the upside, I HAVE to be out of here by 5 because they're laying tile (finally! It's actually going to look like a hallway instead of a war zone) and everyone has to be out. Yay. I'll leave an hour early anyway and head over to the library to study. Tests are hard! wish me luck. I'll need it.

I just had to laugh when I saw this line in my comment-notification email (of course I deleted the comment, but it's funny to see what the spam-bots string together hoping to make their comment sound legitimate):

Eisenhower!! Your mimeograph machine upsets my stomach!!

Yeah. Lovely.

So am I a horrible person to want to head over to King's College since I'm trying to read up on it for my NaNo novel? Sigh. London has always been a place I want to visit, but now it's much higher.

Must go study!

file under: education Posted by Jen at 9:31 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I want this! It would still let me be creative but I wouldn't have to muck around with silly things like a bandsaw. Anyone have a spare $200? Build Your Own Lothlorien Galadrim Legolas Bow. And it would be fun to have these. Cheaper, anyway.

So yeah. Little over a day until the orgo test. Ugh. Bad things are sure to happen. Last time, the Cards managed to pull a miracle out of their bag and made it onto game 7 of the NLCS. So at least one good thing came out of that day. Now, I don't think anything nearly so good will happen. And I'm horribly behind in NaNo, which makes me sad. Week Two wall, indeed. Just my luck to have a test, which by necessity has higher priority than writing for fun, during the crucial hit-the-writing-wall week. Bah. I've got the must-study-want-to-write blues. Ah well. Wish me luck.

  John Hiatt: Have a Little Faith in Me

file under: education Posted by Jen at 5:02 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Are you eligible to vote in missouri? Want to mail in your vote--now? Fill out this form and you can do so. Vote Kerry!

So the Cards pulled out a win last night, forcing game 7 tonight...come on Cards, let's go! I want to see you in the World Series this year! It's funny because I was talking to Eileen last night after the test (at least she sounded like it was hard for her too, so that's somewhat comforting) and she's married to a guy from Texas, so she's turned into an Astros fan...ah well. We can't both be happy. I have to admit a selfish desire to have my team win. Go Cards! Win Game 7! It's my favorite number! Whee! I even wore red, the second day in a row. My mom got extra rally beads. I'd shake 'em if I had 'em.

Yeah, so in other news, orgo test #2 last night. It was awful. I guess what I'll have to do is just do all the problems over again until I figure them out completely. The teacher focused on details, most of which I didn't get. And I totally blanked on some important parts and actually didn't finish the last question. I'm so dead. I don't know how to study for orgo...it seems like too much to memorize, and I thought I had most of the general things down, but then she hits us with details. And some of the stuff she grudgingly told us we should know she didn't even entertain. Sigh. Common names vs IUPAC names...nothing. Why couldn't I remember anything other than carbocations are used in Sn1 and E1 reactions? Guh. I guess I'll have to start going to those workshops, at the lovely times of sunday nights from 9-11 or wednesday nights at same...meh. Isn't it sad when I say that's too late for me?

I was hoping to raise my grade up with this test. Not going to happen, unless everyone else was caught as off guard as I was. Doubt it. Two more tests, a regular one and the final. Dear God be with me. At least I don't have to think about it for a while (though I should) and I can start thinking about NaNoWriMo. I hate disappointing myself. I should go home and read orgo, just because. Oh, right, there's the monthly high school drama alumni birthday rehearsal thing tonight...oy. And when am I going to exercise? I can't wait for Halloween.

Enough of a ramble for you? I really need help in orgo. Ugh. I can't stop thinking about it. Bah. I won't make you read any more about it though...

  Greenwheel: Dim Halo

file under: education Posted by Jen at 4:56 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Can you believe it's exactly two months until the 2004 Presidential election? Please please please don't let Bush be reelected. He just doesn't deserve it. He's done so many bad things to the country. And we need a more balanced voice in our government. I don't think Bush is capable of leading.
Here's what Kerry had to say about the 'misleading' shots leveled against him so far in the campaign...(from an email from http://www.moveonpac.org)

After one of the ugliest and most hate-filled conventions in recent history, John Kerry didn't waste a moment in answering President Bush's speech last night. He was on the air minutes after the President finished, delivering one of his boldest speeches to date to a midnight crowd in Springfield, OH.

"Let me tell you what I think makes someone unfit for duty," he said. "Misleading our nation into war in Iraq makes you unfit to lead this nation. Doing nothing while this nation loses millions of jobs makes you unfit to lead this nation. Letting 45 million Americans go without health care makes you unfit to lead this nation. Letting the Saudi royal family control our energy costs makes you unfit to lead this nation. Handing out billions of government contracts to Halliburton while you're still on their payroll makes you unfit. That's the record of George Bush and Dick Cheney. And it's not going to change. I believe it's time to move America in a new direction; I believe it's time to set a new course for America."

Doesn't that sound like a breath of fresh air?

On the other side of life, orgo sucks. Major wind. I don't know how any of those crazy med school students got through it while taking other classes. Over the course of the weekend I spent abotu ten hours doing homework, which may not sound like a lot, but that's how long it took me to get through one chapter...and I don't understand it that well. I can only hope that the teacher goes through some more stuff at the end. The sad thing is that most of this is review...I had it all before, oh, six years ago. Ah well. I honestly can't find any way to be optimistic about it. The book is pretty, I guess...but that's the only redeeming quality. Anyone know how to rank compounds in order of acidity? Yuck.

file under: education , politics Posted by Jen at 10:38 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Well, Wednesday was my first day back in school. Organic Chemistry. I am insane. It went well enough I suppose...we just did review of general chemistry stuff like Lewis structures and resonance, major and minor species, etc etc, which is good since I haven't had any chemistry in, oh, five years. Why do I want to go to med school? Haven't the foggiest.
So the teacher looks at the roster and says, "I see a fair number of you are full-time students in the day school. So I don't know why you're taking the night-school version. Hopefully not because you thought it would be easier. I don't think it is." Bah. I'm going to die. Well, perhaps not die, but failing spectacularly isn't out of the picture yet. Especially since we won't actually have to turn in homework...it's just problem sets out of the book, and we have a solutions manual--

and how could I forget! The textbook and solutions manual (which are sold separately, of course) for this ONE class cost $200 (nearly exactly). I didn't even buy the molecular modelling kit (also sold separately). Thank goodness I get a staff discount, but still. $200. Why?!?!?!? How can the books possibly be worth that much? Ugh. One class. At least I don't have to pay the $1000-odd tuition. Stupid classes costing money. And damn the fact that the teacher neglected to let anyone at the bookstore know that we'll use the same books as the day-school class, so they didn't set aside any used books for us. Not that it would have helped all that much, but still. Ugh.

--so most of the time I'll probably start doing a problem, get confused, look it up in the solutions manual, and promptly lose any good that actually working the problem would do me. Frick. Bloody Hell. Anyone out there wanna give me tips? Please do. Mom wants me to get an A in the class. The teacher informed us that her average is about a C+. Great. She grades on a curve but I can just guess where I'll be on that bell...right smack dab in the middle. Stupid orgo. Why is it a requirement for med school? No one I've talked to says they use it. Shoot, I've been working for two years and haven't used nearly any chemistry that isn't basic math anyway. Ugh. Maybe I can draw some solace from drawing. Line angle structures, that is. Er. Probably not then.

Sorry about that rant. I could also tell you how my laptop monitor is flickering and that I really need a new one (esp so we can get dsl at the apartment) but that I still have to pay my cousin for the sewing machine and I'm trying to save something, anything...I can't believe with the job that I still have about the same amount in the bank as I did last year. Wanna give me a raise? Shoot. Someone out there who's actually making money with web design, please tell me how you do it and let me in on the secret. And maybe someday I'll finish the latest ficlet I started, about King Arthur reincarnated. An unoriginal idea if there ever was one, but hey, at least I'm writing. Let's see how long it takes to get to six chapters for that. Six or seven seems to be the magic number of chapters that I get stuck on. Both Moonstone and Decadence are hovering right around there (though of course Moonstone's chapters are quite a bit longer than Decadence) and back when I was writing (Human) Development I got through the first seven chapters pretty easily and they got up on CD, and then there was the lull while I figured out what the heck happened on Antar. At least it got finished. One of these days I'm gonna make a Roswell skin and a Moonstone skin and a Decadence skin so I can use the fictionary page as the actual story site. Someday.

Tired of the ranting and rambling yet? You're not? Too bad. That's all I got.

  We Are, Ana (Spider-man 2 soundtrack)

file under: education , rants Posted by Jen at 1:51 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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(by Eric Vesper, taken from a girl on the track team's im profile)
The simplest of acids has got to be Glycine
And if it's a long one, it's probably Lysine
Alanine's simple, its has just one methyl
Valine is bigger; it's one methylethyl
And Aspartic Acid has one CH2 there
But if it's Glutamic, why then there are two there
Tryptophan, Tyrosine both have their rings
And, too, Phenylalanine, one of those things
If you like hydroxyls then Serine's your chain
And, if that one's taken, Threonine remains
Arginine has an abundance of N's
Just like Asparagine (Glutamine's friend)
Cysteine has sulfur, pK eight-point-three
Methionine's sulfur binds with CH3
Histidine flip-flops when mildly acid
Leucine is bulky and also quite placid
Then there's Isoleusine, which branches quite early
And finally Proline, whose structure's quite squirrelly.
So if it's an acid whose name is one we know
Chances are good the acid's amino

file under: education Posted by Jen at 3:41 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Where does this figure come from?

Average lifetime earnings of a high school graduate is $1,087,500

Average lifetime earnings of a college graduate is $1,613,000

A 4-year degree = (40 classes) * (3 days a week) * (16 weeks of class)

(on average) = 1920 hours in class

For every hour in class, students spend 3 hours in a lab, tutoring center,

or doing homework.

(1900 hours in class) * (3 hours) = 5760 additional hours

Use the difference between what a high school graduate and

a college graduate earns ($1,613,000 - $1,087,500) = $525,500

Divide by the total number of learning hours (1920 + 5760) = 7680 hours

For a grand total of $525,50 / 7680 hours = $68.42 per hour

from the StL Community College FactFinder

file under: education Posted by Jen at 5:25 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I got accepted into UPenn! I can't believe it. And it was in a thin envelope too. lol. I don't know what I'm going to do now, I was sure I wouldn't get in anywhere, I would just work for a year and hope that I could get in next year. It's supposedly about $42,000 to go, and unless they give me a nice assistantship I don't think it will be financially feasible, but hey, a girl can dream. It sure looks nice.

I kept meaning to remark on this earlier, but I couldn't get on.

Jack Buck, a famous and beloved radio announcer for the St. Louis Cardinals baseball team, died last week. And Darryl Kile, a very good pitcher for the Cards, died on saturday. So you can imagine that it's been a little depressing in this town lately.

But life moves on, and cells grow, hopefully as they should now that we've discovered that I was putting the totally wrong amount of a substance into the media. Hopefully I won't be so bored, and won't make so many mistakes. And hopefully if I do end up going to school this fall I can still be around for the DMB concert on my birthday. It sure would suck to miss the concert once I finally can see it, and can't return the tix, and there's that little thing that I'd rather not move in on my birthday....

sigh. I really miss ethernet. It's almost worth it to go back to school just for that. lol.

file under: education Posted by Jen at 1:01 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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