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Vintage

I went out for a run the other day when it was kind of chilly, so I pulled on an old long-sleeved tee. It happened to be the shirt I got from the District cross-country meet in the fall of my freshman year of high school. It's huge on me (what was with the XL phase we all went through in the early 90s?) and has lost all elasticity in the cuffs, but it's soft and makes me laugh at its lovely navy-and-purple color scheme. It's also nearly 20 years old.

I realized that I felt weird to wear a shirt that had seen almost two decades of use, when I was the original owner. I have a few vintage t-shirts my mother gave me (I'm wearing one today, natch) that are older than my high school shirts, of course, and probably some Goodwill shirts approaching that age, but my high school shirts are in remarkably good shape for workout clothes, and I will keep wearing them until I can't (and then I'll entertain ideas of making a quilt out of them). It's just weird to think of wearing something I've owned for more than half my life.

Getting older doesn't bother me, for the most part (except when I complain about aches and pains, and this stupid cough I've had for a week would have been gone by now if I was younger). I figure as I age the weird feeling will happen more often as I develop more nostalgia, as everyone does.

My friend Kate celebrated her birthday yesterday (and my parents celebrated their wedding anniversary!) and we had dinner. We had a good time, but I always forget I'm a year older than most of my core of friends. It's not that big of a difference, it just sometimes makes me sad.

This website is now 11 years old. I know I haven't kept it up, and I always intend to do more with it, but I just don't have that much to say. There's that meme for "Draw My Life" running around the viral video sites, and as much as I love them, I just don't think my life would excite anyone. I'll spare you my stick figures. Have a good one after the jump.

I'm sure you are all on pins and needles to know how the wedding planning is going. Honestly, not all that much has happened since the last entry. We have deposits down for the DJ service and the photographer, and we sent out save the date cards. The bridesmaids (should I call them bridesmatrons? 3 out of 4 are married) have dresses on order. I have ideas for decorating. We need to figure out big things like an officiant and picking invitations. And we have to save money.

All I want to do is pick out a honeymoon destination, but I think that is probably going to have to wait for the last minute, and hopefully we'll find an awesome deal on a resort that has dolphin encounters and horseback riding.

Plenty to dream about, I suppose. I heard about a study that claimed 33 was the perfect age. Since that's what I'll be when I get married, it just might be true.

And one day, I'll look back at these days and marvel that it was half a lifetime ago.

file under: muses , reallife , wedding Posted by Jen at 10:45 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Say yes to the dress.

Detail of a Vera Wang wedding dress. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I'm somewhat at loose ends, now. I picked a wedding dress over the weekend, and it seems like I don't have anything to do for a while, wedding planning wise. Now it's just save, save, save, since I have to pay for the dress, and put down another deposit on the venue, and book all the vendors...but that's for later. The wedding is still nearly a year away, so I have a little time to catch my breath before the next big thing.

(The picture isn't of my dress, by the way. My fiance doesn't want to even hear me talk about it, much less see it on the blog! I could never afford a Vera Wang dress anyway.)

I'm a little disappointed that I didn't have that magical moment when I knew I had on THE dress. Honestly, I don't really like trying on clothes (though I don't mind buying them. I certainly have enough) and I don't think I've ever fallen in love with a pair of shoes, much less a dress. I think I'd be pretty happy with whatever I found, and I'm lucky to have somewhat of a nice shape so most things look okay on me. I tried a few, figured out pretty quickly what looked good and what didn't, and even gave my mom's picks a chance. I'm glad I did, because it turned out that the last dress I tried was her choice, and that was the winner. It took a while and listing the pros and cons of other ones I liked, and a discussion about price and alterations. This dress was on clearance, so the store couldn't order a different size. Luckily the dress fit, but with a few additions, it could turn into the perfect dress, AND save me some money since I don't have to search for one with every single specification. It's not super fancy, it's not designer, but it looks good on me and turned out to be even less expensive than we thought. SCORE. The alterations won't add too much to the price, and I'll end up with a dress I like when I walk down the aisle. I might even look a little like a princess.

That teary-eyed moment may not have happened, but thinking about the dress kept me up last night. I usually wake up during the night, and I couldn't keep myself from thinking about wedding things. Every time I'd get frustrated with that, I'd tell myself to quit and just get back to sleep, but I suck at Zen. I'm excited about the wedding, of course, but I'd rather have my sleep, thankyouverymuch. I hope now that I have some time when I don't have to think about weddings I'll relax (she says, with NaNoWriMo looming). I'm really glad I got the dress out of the way now. I can concentrate on NaNo and enjoy myself for a while, without spending money. Next up, in a few months: creativity with pictures, I think.

file under: celebration , reallife , wedding Posted by Jen at 3:19 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Planning

I haven't blogged all that much lately, and hopefully that will change, since I have to get myself writing more. It's been a month and change since Mike asked me marry him (and I said yes, of course!) so sharing wedding plans with you all seems like a good way to get back into it. This time next year I'll probably be freaking out because we'll be just days away from our wedding!

(Before I do that, let me tout our NaNoWriMo region's massive planning spree and our relationship with 7 library branches around town! And we got all this figured out in August!)

Being the somewhat obsessive person that I am, I have a bunch of wedding magazines and a couple of wedding books (aside: a few of these are a decade old, and the information is still pertinent, if some of the styles are terribly out of fashion and the prices are surely too low) and everything says the first step is to find a venue. The venue determines more than you think: how many people you can invite (though you have to have an idea of how many people you want to invite to pick a venue), what kind of dress to get, what sort of decorations work with the venue, how much extra you'll have to do (does the venue cater? Will you have to decorate the place yourself?), how far will people have to go to get from ceremony to reception, where your wedding photos will be taken, &c. It also seems to determine the overall budget. You can go low and rent a location only, and DIY that thing to high heaven. Or you can blow the biggest wad you've ever seen with a massive ballroom and a steak and lobster course.

It happened, though. We picked a place, and I can't say I wasn't stressed before and after we did. Writing that check for a deposit on our chosen date made me sick--it's so much money. Everyone says weddings will cost more than you think. That's scary when you're the ones picking up the tab. As much as my parents love me, there's no way my dad's going to hand someone a huge check at the end of the day. That's fine--I don't mind, and I always sort of figured that I'd have a DIY wedding. But this is one of those moments when I wish I had a trust fund.

We're going to be very poor for a while. Planning a wedding is exciting, but not when you have to pay for it. But that's okay. We have a budget, we know what we can spend, and we'll try our hardest to make it a great party. I just want to have fun. And if that means we spend the whole time in half-lit hotel lighting, that'll be okay. We'll save, save, save, and hopefully not go insane between now and next October.

If you've got any wedding related advice or vendors you love, please leave a comment!

file under: wedding , reallife Posted by Jen at 4:03 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Happy, happy day

Hello from the Moonrise Hotel! You should go. It's awesome. Expensive, but super fun. Mike got us a room for my birthday...and another little thing. But before I tell you about that...

I turn 32 today. Happy birthday to me! Today is the first day of my week-long vacation. The past weekend we played softball in the rain and won, then played some accountants and lost. Ironic how it didn't rain all season then dumped a bunch of precipitation on us in one weekend. Good thing we've got this hotel room to enjoy...

Especially since this happened.

Jen's a happy birthday girl.

file under: celebration , reallife Posted by Jen at 9:53 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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10 years

etoiline.com is officially ten years old today. Around midnight, April 24, 2002, I finally completed the transaction for the domain and started working on the website. I was so into it that I forgot the fact that it would renew each year on my parents' anniversary.

Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad! I love you so much and I'm so glad you're still together.

Back then, I'd had my last final (probably math or something else engineering related) and most likely track practice (we were trying to qualify for Nationals, which didn't end up working out, alas) and then I got back to the dorm. I realized that I didn't have much to do for the next week or so (I got to stay in the dorm a little longer than most since I was a senior and still participating in sports) and I'd wanted to buy a domain for a while, so lo, I did.

The word 'etoiline' comes from a story I wrote while I was in high school. Yes, it's a derivative of the French word for star. The story is probably a trunk novel by now, but it's still got a lot of good stuff in it, and I'm sure I'll be mining it for years to come. One of these days I'll get around to purchasing a domain with my name in it. But I'm not a famous author yet. I doubt anyone is really looking for me that hard.

I don't have the first entries from that blog easily available. I was using a different blogging platform at the time, and though the entries are saved, I have no idea where they are. I think they were little things like "Hello, world" and "I read this book today." The blog hasn't evolved much

I wanted to a) have a new layout for the site and b) write you a short story, but I'm not the speediest web designer and whenever I try to write short stories they end up being pretty long. So you'll just have to wait for the new layout and pester me for the next story. Any blog topic ideas are welcome.

Odd to think that it's been ten years. Ten years since I finished my last college course, as well. How time flies.

Happy birthday to Kate and Gordon, too.

See you at the St. Charles Artwalk this weekend? I hope so. Come keep me company and see great art.

file under: reallife , webetcetera Posted by Jen at 9:51 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Spellcliff

I know I haven't said much about NaNo here this year, but it was sort of a busy time, being ML for the St. Louis region and all. For year eight, I wrote another fantasy (of course). Here's the one-sentence summary:

When a librarian finds a murdered historian in the undocumented vaults of the library, she discovers that magic, unusable for centuries, is returning to the world, and those who once wielded it are returning to take back their homeland.

It kind of ended up being like that, so I guess I stuck to the synopsis better than I have in previous years. Yes, I did manage to actually have a dead body show up in the first chapter right when it was supposed to, as opposed to last year, when I didn't kill the person I was planning on until the very last section. Planning, it is your friend when writing.

There's still more to go. I'll see how many words I can put down tomorrow night, but I've got that purple bar of win, and it makes me smile.

Here's to those of you who took this jaunt into literary abandon with me, and those who are still chugging along. Keep writing, my friends!

file under: celebration , fantasy , reallife , writings Posted by Jen at 11:39 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Yesterday

Yesterday was like any other day. It was Sunday, so I could sleep in. I met up with some friends for an early lunch, read a book or two, did some laundry, worked out, did my part to stimulate the American economy, watched a couple of movies. Aside from the hopefully not stray cat* it was a pretty normal day.

But it seemed weird that it was normal. It was September 11th, and it seemed like there should have been something that stood out to mark the tenth anniversary of the attack on the Twin Towers. But Mike and I rather studiously avoided any network tv, not wanting to see the memorials, we didn't talk about it, and nothing else felt different. Of course 9/11 was at the back of my mind the entire time. But it was just another day.

I know that for some people, 9/11 will never be an okay day. For me, though, as much as I abhor the ideals that made the terrorists even envisage this plan, it's not part of my life. I didn't know anyone in New York that day. I wasn't awake when the planes hit the towers; I missed the first barrage of news and didn't find out about it until my mom called me, panicked that universities might be targeted next. I went to my late morning class anyway, just because I didn't know what else to do. There wasn't much information yet, but eventually all classes were cancelled (which rarely happens at WU), and I spent the afternoon in the green space by the chapel and prayed for all those unknown people.

Today I saw some pictures from 9/11, shocking and scary. There were a few of the people who fell or jumped from the tower, and that took my breath. But still, I'm removed from it. On the one hand I feel callous and uncaring, but on the other I still thank God that I wasn't there. That my family wasn't there. That no one I know was in those Towers, or had their name read out during a memorial overlooking the largest man-made waterfalls that mark the place where they once stood.

Aside from hassles at the airport (brief--I've only flown a handful of times since that day) and increased security at events, I haven't been affected much by the tragedy. I'm so grateful for that. It means that I can have just another day.

Bless those who can't.

*during our walk last night, Mike spotted a cat sitting near a car wheel, and said cat noticed us and came right up to me and started purring and rubbing. We weren't sure what to do; the cat was obviously healthy, but we hoped he wasn't a lost cat. Long story short, emergency vehicles drove past with sirens on, and the cat ran away, hopefully to the house he calls home. A man who happened to be outside with his tiny dog said that his neighbors had a similar cat that sometimes goes outside. Hopefully that's the same cat, and he's okay. We'll probably never know.

file under: muses , reallife Posted by Jen at 9:51 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Something to think about

Everybody must know by now, that the name that has haunted America for a decade is gone and good riddance to him. I love that there were celebrations at Ground Zero and I hope that the survivors and relatives of lost ones can feel some closure. But there's a lot of sadness that such celebration happens. I'm relieved he's dead, and no one can dispute that he did horrible things that no one, American or not, deserved, but then I think, "someone died." Quite a few someones, really. That's not usually something to be happy about.

I'm conflicted, I suppose. Happy he's gone, but not liking that I'm happy. Maybe this will make life a little safer. Maybe some of the restrictions on travel will be eased. Maybe the troops will be able to come home sooner.

But maybe nothing will change. There are still crazy people out there, and there are plenty of other agitators in other places, and that also depresses me. But you can't live your life waiting for the sky to fall. So I'll rejoice that a bad man no longer can inspire hatred in his followers, and I'll hope for good things in the future.

file under: reallife , serious , thoughts Posted by Jen at 12:29 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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9 times

I've renewed the domain for etoiline.com 9 times as of yesterday. That's scary close to 10, which means I'll have been blogging intermittently for a decade next year. Wow. Guess I should update more often, eh? And my parents have been married for 35 years, which is spectacular and sweet. I love you both.

Hope you all had a happy Easter. Things are crazy around here, what with the tornado hitting the airport and friends and family on their way to weddings. Next weekend is the St.Charles Artwalk (see both my parents' work!), as well as the STL Bookfair, so you've got plenty to keep you busy.

file under: reallife , webetcetera Posted by Jen at 9:30 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Fleet

Image via Wikipedia

Last Saturday was (among other things) the UAA Outdoor Track & Field Conference Championships back at my alma mater Washington University in St. Louis. It's been eight years since I ran on that track, but the track alumni have been meeting up at conferences for the last few years, and they planned a tiny alumni meet. Sprint medley, anyone?

News of the meet made me finally purchase that indoor cycle I'd been thinking about getting. I knew I wouldn't get in the shape I'd ideally have to be in, but I could at least try to drop a few pounds. I somehow managed to hurt my thigh muscles the week before the event, of course, but nothing was going to stop me from running that sprint!

Nothing but a tornado, actually. Yes, the relay (200-200 (me!)-400-800m) was literally on the track (after the tornado sirens went off twice, and the lightning siren once) when someone got the news that a tornado had really touched down in West County and we were all herded to the basement of the Athletic Complex (lots of unwashed wet athletes in a small space, yay!) as the rain poured down.

So I didn't get to run in a race. But I warmed up and ran a bit, and put on my spikes that hadn't seen daylight in eight years. And I did warm up sprints before the aborted start, and I remembered how good it felt to run down that track, how different it is to run in spikes and not regular running shoes, how strange to think that at one time I was covering seven meters in a second and maybe, just maybe, I could do that again.

I miss track so much.

Big Yellow Taxi, Counting Crows

file under: competition , reallife Posted by Jen at 2:29 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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A new place

It's hard to believe that I own a house. I don't really, not for another thirty years, but that I can claim I bought a house is a pretty strange prospect for me.

I didn't think I'd buy a house on my own. I thought that I'd have a friend or a husband doing it with me. I'm so glad my boyfriend has been around to help out, but it's just my name on the deed, and it's a little weird. Eh. I can say I bought a house before I turned 30. I guess that's one accomplishment that I can be proud of. Sure doesn't seem like I've done all that much sometimes.

There are lots of boxes downstairs and I think I know what's in most of them. Organizing, that's what I need to do, yes.

On the fun side, it's almost September, which comes before October, which means there's not too much time before November and NaNo. I have a couple of ideas floating around, and while it looks like I won't get to do a collaboration with my friend, I think I can figure something out. Better get cracking on that research! Yes, writing fantasy does require research. It has to be believable fantasy, you know.

Interested in spending 30 days and nights in literary abandon? Head over to NaNoWriMo and see what all the fuss is about.

file under: reallife , writings Posted by Jen at 9:53 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Dragons and princesses

Perhaps all the dragons of our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us once beautiful and brave. Perhaps everything terrible is in its deeps something helpless that wants help from us.

From Rilke's Letters to a Young Poet, via Jane Friedman's blog.

The house is looking more livable now...but still lots to do. And an apartment to pack up/clean. Sorry to all the prospective tenants coming to take a look...just don't have time to tidy up much. I can't wait until I get moved into my new house. It will be SO nice.

Farewell Suite, Free Willy sdtk

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 12:51 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Keys!

I guess I'm officially an adult: I closed on a house yesterday. I have my very own address. Excuse me while I squee.

--ZOMG keys!--

Ahem. It's small but well proportioned and just the right size for me. There is so much work to be done, but eventually it will look really nice, and be, you know, livable with actual appliances and furniture.

One of these days I'll have a painting party and you can all come. I'll have a reason to use the tiny grill. And for those of you who don't want to get your hands dirty, yes, I believe I'll have a housewarming party too Details to follow...sometime.

I'm excited. My bank account cries, and I'm sore already from lugging purchases and cleaning, but this is a good thing. An investment in my future--a life step, a part of the American Dream. Now all I have to do is write the Great American Novel and I can get out of debt. *wink wink*

file under: celebration , reallife Posted by Jen at 11:38 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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A Giant Fourth

Overheard on the radio:

A giant is taking questions like: Are you really a giant? Is your wife a giant too?.

Then he gets this one: How does a giant celebrate the Fourth of July?

He says, "I have to get far away from the fireworks, or else I have to duck" (haha) "no, seriously, I love some hotdogs, some hamburgers, and a good mattress sale."

?! I don't even know what mattress store this commercial was for--I was too flabbergasted by the total non sequiteur.

Not so funny: RIP Farrah Fawcett and Jacko's in the hospital following a heart attack. Pop culture just took a major hit.

file under: funny , reallife Posted by Jen at 4:20 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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a softball haiku

Since it is the day before a softball game and it's raining, I present to you a softball haiku:

softball--a dream that
never becomes realized
because it rains so

Last night I had a dream where I was a Transformer-like Eliza Dushku (yes, I was listening to the soundtrack to Transformers last night--why do you ask?) and I really wanted to read the as-yet unpublished manuscript of some famous author--dunno who. I could get anywhere I wanted because I was pretty and rich and then could, you know, transform to get out of there. So I go to this author's place, grab the manuscript, but the police come before I can leave. Thus, I run out of the house, throw the ms. in the air, become a car, and careen off, but the policeman shoots and knocks off the license plate. Since I am a bibliophile, after the policeman has given up the chase, all he finds is the piece of plate with part of a plastic plate protector. The partial plate says OO, and the plate protector says "ublic Lib"--get it? The plate reads BOOKS (or something similar) and the protector promotes some city's Public Library.

And then I told it all to Eliza Dushku, who was apparently at a garage sale with me. Go fig.

On a serious note: one of my favorite authors (and one who probably played a part in my wanting to be a fantasy author), David Eddings, passed away last night. He will be missed. I brought the first book in the Elenium, The Diamond Throne, with me to work to read in memoriam.

The Diamond Throne, David Eddings
file under: books , dreams , getmoving , reallife Posted by Jen at 9:47 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Six

Huzzah! Today is my six-year anniversary of starting work at WUMS. One more year and my kids can go to WU for free. My non-existent, not-even-a-twinkle-in-my-eye kids. One day, mom, one day you'll be a grandmother.

Also: househunting is an exercise in frustration. The hopeful-excited/dejected-disappointed cycle is NOT COOL. Do not want. But I need a place to live and I want that place to be my own, so to the hunt we go.

Thirdly, if you are in want of something to do this weekend, stop by the Kirkwood Festival of Food and Flowers, and see Artists in Bloom, one of which will be my mother. It's located right across from the Kirkwood City Hall, just a short walk from the Amtrak station, and buddied up with a farmer's market. Also, Dewey's Pizza is just up the street. You can't lose. Hope to see you around!

Streets Have No Name, Vanessa Carlton
Middlemarch, George Eliot
file under: reallife , working Posted by Jen at 5:34 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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The Importance of the novel

And here lies the vast importance of the novel, properly handled. It can inform and lead into new places the flow of our sympathetic consciousness, and it can lead our sympathy away in recoil from things gone dead. Therefore, the novel, properly handled, can reveal the most secret places of life: for it is in the passional secret places of life, above all, that the tide of sensitive awareness needs to ebb and flow, cleansing and freshening.

from Ch. 9 of Lady Chatterley's Lover, D.H. Lawrence.

Got a bit of a bombshell today when my roommate informed me that she won't be renewing her part of the lease. There's only a month left on the current one. I've been looking at condos, even have a realtor and a banker guy, but I don't know how this is going to work out in a month. Do I sign the lease and find a subletter when I find a new place? Not sign the lease and hope something works out? Sigh.

file under: books , reallife Posted by Jen at 7:20 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Happy () Day

AttS is SEVEN today!

My parents celebrate their anniversary and my friend Kate and my coworker Gordon (sorry I can't be there for drinks) can tally up another year on this day.

Huzzah to all of you.

If you're in town looking for something to do (other than the book fair, that is), head on over to the St. Charles Spring Artwalk. My mom will be displaying her artwork at 222 N Main Street, and there is plenty of parking behind the building. We'll be there all weekend, so why don't you stop by and say hi, and pick up a gift for Mother's Day?

Happy weekend, all

file under: art , celebration , reallife Posted by Jen at 1:24 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I wish

From zen_habits on Twitter, who said, Complete this sentence: I wish my life were more ...

Writerly. (Yeah, not a word. But I wish I acted more like an author. This is a wish I can and should make true.)

Exciting. (Though that whole proverb of living in interesting times...perhaps I better stick with the steady job, even though it's not quite paying me enough)

Clean. (I at least have a path between my bedroom door and my bed, but there's plenty of room in there for shelves, if I ever stopped buying books enough to have money for some.)

Arty. (I used to draw on everything. Even now, my twitter feed is full of Photoshop and Illustrator resources, and my delicious account has hundreds of links to tutorials on graphic design. One day I will be creative many ways.)

Outdoorsy. (I miss camping. I miss horseback riding. I will go whitewater rafting again someday. I will hike the Rockies again and visit Canada. Maybe.)

Financially secure. (I have money enough, right now, but not quite enough to do what I want to. Hopefully that will change, someday. Until then, I must write.)

I think I can change these things. I'm lazy, as you might have noticed me mention in this blog before, so I'd have to get over the fear and anxiousness of change, but perhaps someday I will.

Lady Chatterley's Lover, DH Lawrence
file under: dreams , reallife Posted by Jen at 5:00 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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too nice

It is too nice outside today to be in the lab. But that is what I do, so here is where I am

But we will go out for lunch. Huzzah.

For all the other lucky St. Louisans who get to go outside, please don't forget about Artists Boutique this weekend at the Kirkwood Community Center. Lots of great artists, lots of pretty stuff. Find an Easter present, or a wedding gift. Look for yourself, look for your friends. Support arts in your community. I know times are tough economically--but every little bit helps.

In news of the very nice, my parents got a relatively new Mac--for free. As soon as they get internet I'll help them kit it out, and my parents will join the Internet Revolution! Hopefully I can help them not be scairt of that shiny piece of tech.

Cheers! Hope it's a good day for you.

Free Fallin', John Mayer
Blood Rites, Jim Butcher
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Forgotten

I try not to leave bookmarks in things. Whenever I return books to the library I turn them upside down and flip the pages in case I do forget. This site has a bunch of interesting ones from people who aren't quite so anal as me...though I think I did manage to lose a story idea in a book and that was quite sad. I'm sure I'll come up with another one, though

Back from Champaign. Had fun at Leo's bachelorette party, though I was continually wracked with anxiety because I sort of hate planning. I had more than enough activities, so we didn't finish hardly anything...you know, eating and drinking (margaritas and other things--pineapple juice, banana rum and cream make quite a nice drink!) seem to take up a lot of time. Hopefully if I'm ever a bridesmaid for someone else I won't freak out quite so much about it.

Guess I ought to write my toast for the wedding...coming up in three weeks! At least I'll be doing a little writing...sigh. I keep thinking of ideas, but haven't gotten them typed up. Last week was hell at work, long days and stressful assays, but hopefully now I'll have a little less on my shoulders and I can bang something out. Off to groceries!

Jack Sparrow, PotC: DMC soundtrack
The Fallen, Thomas E Sniegoski (just finished Slumdog Millionaire)
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Coincidence

Bones is investigating a murder on an island with the same name as the street I grew up on. Things like that make me blink.

Less than a month to both NaNo and the election. I'll have a lot more fun with one than the other. I'll leave you to guess which one.

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Patriot Day

As much as I hate the name, today is a day to remember those lost seven years ago. Seven years. How could it be that long ago?

***

Today is also the day in which a large white sheet is covering the in-progress building across the alley at work. We think they're fireproofing things, and the sheet is to keep our building from getting inadvertently sprayed. But it looks like it's snowing out there. Looking out the window just gives a blank view, and it's very disconcerting.

Today is also the day of our last regular season make-up of a rainout of a rainout softball game. As my coach put it, nothing short of biblical will stop us from playing, so I forsee a soggy evening on a muddy or grassy field. Maybe my cleats are dried out from last week...

Whiskey and Water, Elizabeth Bear
file under: getmoving , reallife , serious Posted by Jen at 10:14 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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a birthday present

Thank you, Michael. You're sweet.

Saving Josh, Trevor Morris, from Moonlight
King Arthur's Britain: A Photographic Odyssey
file under: celebration , reallife Posted by Jen at 10:59 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Research

Sometimes I forget how much I love it.

Take right now, for example: I have this idea for this year's NaNo that it will have a quasi-Victorian setting, maybe based on reality, maybe a little steampunk, so I looked up books on Victorian history. For those keeping score, that was when Queen Victoria ruled England, circa 1840-1870. I now own three books on Victorian history, because not only are the books full of information and juicy little tidbits that will pad out my daily word count nicely, but sometimes they're just hilarious. I'm sure that someday people will look back at our time and wonder what we were thinking, because that's what's happening when I read these. And I'm having fun. I like learning. History can be interesting!

But I'm not the sort of person to seek out nonfiction books normally. I have to have a good reason. And research for NaNo is a pretty darn good reason.

This is why I know I could be a professional writer. Because I don't mind the research. It's quite fun to absorb all the bits of information during the research phase then have them suddenly coalesce in a somewhat coherent whole during the draft phase.

Here's to research. May it never get boring.

And here's to me, who got a whole lot of books (and the 2nd season of Heroes), because it's that little thing known as my birthday. Huzzah.

The Hound and the Falcon, Judith Tarr and Inside the Victorian House, Judith Flanders
file under: books , celebration , reallife , thoughts , writings Posted by Jen at 12:33 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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It had to happen sometime

I'm hanging out here in the Denver Airport, waiting for a plane. I was supposed to be leaving right about now, but the plane was delayed two hours getting into LAX, and therefore it will be about an hour and a half late getting here. I know I was going to get home late...but now it's really late.

This hasn't happened to me before, I don't think. I'm pretty sure that all the times I've flown I've never had a delayed plane, so in the grand scheme of things, it's not horrible. It's not like I won't get to sleep in my own bed tonight (though the beds in the Hyatt were pretty darn good), like the person who was suppposed to be on a 5:30 pm flight to Chicago and didn't leave until slightly before 8 and will have to spend the night there. I've got plenty to do (knitting, iPod, laptop--go free WiFi @ Denver, boo not-free @ STL--several books, some of which are personalized with author signatures and of course that little thing called writing) and I don't have to go to work tomorrow, but I do wish I was home. And I'll have to have some food here eventually, which I'm not too happy with, because I've had to buy every single meal since after breakfast on Thursday morning, and I'll be quite glad to go home to actual food that doesn't cost me money every time.

Denvention (Worldcon) was a lot of fun. I got to ~~stalk~~hang out with Carol Berg quite a bit and I roomed with one of my friends from last year's Archon/NASFiC, so that was cool. Not quite as many writing-centric panels as I would like, and I definitely want to go to World Fantasy now, to compare the two, but this year's WF is out, since it's in Calgary and I don't have a valid passport, so I'll have to wait for next Nov...and eek, it's in Nov, which is NaNo time (eek, NaNo is only three months away) and wow was that a run-on sentence. I'll try to do better next time.

I like Denver. I could live here. But I'd like to be at home.

Mischief Managed, HP3 sdtk
Blood and Iron Elizabeth Bear (bought at Worldcon)
file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 9:33 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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RIP Randy Pausch

Randy Pausch was a professor at Carnegie Mellon who died yesterday from pancreatic cancer, the same type of cancer that my uncle died from. He gave two very moving, inspirational lectures and wrote a book and gave many interviews. He lived strong and filled his last days with whatever he could, and I can have nothing but respect for him. The world has lost a good man. We need more heroes like him. Pancreatic Cancer Action Network.

"The Last Lecture" and "Time Management" after the cut.

file under: reallife , serious , thoughts Posted by Jen at 6:20 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Farewell to the King

It's a sad day when a huge part of St. Louis becomes owned by a foreign company. Anheuser-Busch is now Anheuser-Busch InBev...

I don't even like beer. If I've been to the brewery it was long ago, way before I was able to enjoy the tasting at the end. But I do love the Clydesdales and the dalmatians and the many events and destinations that Busch is a part of, and they are a huge part of St. Louis culture, and indeed the US. Sure, the mean people who bought the company in a hostile takeover say they'll keep sight of A-B's standards, but that's what they said when May company bought Famous-Barr. I call ballocks. And who thought that the Belgians were so rotten?

I wonder if it's still going to be Busch Stadium in a few years. I hope so. I always liked that name. I realize it is actually product placement, but it's been Busch for so long, it doesn't seem that way. Maybe the Busch family can keep their names on some things.

Bye bye Busch. I hope you stay the same, but I bet you won't.

Oh yeah, happy Bastille Day.

Cemeteries of London, Coldplay
Guardians of the Keep, Carol Berg
file under: reallife , serious Posted by Jen at 10:09 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Milestone

This was a nice letter to find in my work mailbox...

"Dear Jennifer:
Congratulations! You have reached a milestone in your career with Washington University School of Medicine. It is with sincere appreciation for your 5 years of continued service and dedication that I write to recognize your efforts..."

Five years. Don't they go by in a blink.*

Only two years until my kids can go to WU for free, haha. Hopefully in two years I'll have a book or two with an agent...

*name that movie

Goodbye and Godspeed, Deep Impact soundtrack

file under: reallife , working Posted by Jen at 5:26 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Creation

No matter what your field--science, engineering, the creative arts, cocktail making--ideas are in the air for the grabbing. All you have to do is the hard part:

Turn them into something real.

From Justine Larbalestier's blog.

file under: reallife , writings Posted by Jen at 1:14 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Celebrate (lots)

This is a big day.

Happy Anniversary to my parents. I'm so proud of you for staying together and staying in love. <3 <3 <3

Happy Birthday to Kate and Gordon! *party*

And this website turns six. Six years I've been doing this. Six years of very infrequent blogging and not so often with the layout changes...

I really should have gotten a new layout up. I've got one almost ready, but I've been a bit stymied by the changes MT4 made to their default code, so it's...not...quite...there yet. Soon.

Still writing, still reading, still dreaming. Have a great day, folks.

New Moon, Stephenie Meyer (yes, again)
file under: celebration , reallife , webetcetera Posted by Jen at 10:04 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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what's shaking?

I woke up around 5 am this morning because the bed was shaking. At first I thought it was the cat, hiding under my bed all night, finally having enough and making a ruckus to wake me up and let him out. But no, no cat under the bed. He was crouched outside my door, probably rather freaked.

There was an earthquake along the southern Illinois-Indiana border, and we felt it all the way over here. I thought it might be, once I determined the bed-shaking was not the fault of the cat, but I wanted confirmation. Apparently my cognitive skills aren't the best in the middle of the night, so my search for 'earthquake st. louis' didn't immediately yield the right site. Finally found it, and lo, a big red square in the midwest! Very odd.

I've only ever felt one other earthquake, and it was much smaller. I was outside in my parents' backyard, laying on the grass and staring up at the clouds, and I felt a tremor run beneath me. I didn't realize what it was at first (you know, daydreaming, head in the clouds) until my mom asked me if I'd felt anything out there. The news had reported the quake.

I sincerely hope that I never get so used to the feeling that I know exactly what it feels like.

My neck is still hurting after waking up sore yesterday. I don't know what I could have done, but it's not cool. So to make myself feel better, and hopefully make you smile too, a lolcat:

see more crazy cat pics

TGIF!

file under: funny , reallife Posted by Jen at 4:15 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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snow angels

...at least, that's what I'd like to be doing right now, and not be at work. It's too pretty of a snow to be inside. And then run inside to hot cocoa and other warm things to get rid of this sore throat. Damn winter and low humidity.

And bugger cars that need repairs. At least some of the repairs are covered by warranty (because of a nice serviceman, I suspect) but there are other things that need fixing that are required normal maintenance, so I just get to eat that. And it's fun to know that somewhere along the way I lost an oil cap. Shows you how I didn't look under the hood.

Eh. I didn't need to drive today anyway, and excess money just means I buy books. I've still got a fair amount in savings, even though I won't like losing the extra I was planning to put forward for Worldcon in August.

Gotta get cracking on that book, then.

Finale, Pippin
Nightingale's Lament, Simon R Green
file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 12:27 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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yep, that's my name on the cover

So if you've been reading this blog for a while, you might know that the writer's group that I participate in has written an anthology of short stories based on landmarks of St. Louis. I'm in it, with a modern day faerie tale that takes place at the Muny (the Municipal Theater in Forest Park, the oldest and largest outdoor amphitheater in America, with trees growing out of the stage...)

And by golly, the book is out! You can check out the page at www.toastedraviolibook.com (though there's not much there at the moment) which has a link to buying the book online, do a book search on Amazon for Toasted Ravioli, or (the best way) ask me for a book in person. That way you get a discount and a signed copy and I (or the group) gets more money.

Or better yet, come to our first signing this Saturday (tomorrow, eek) the 26th of January at Legacy Books, 5249 Delmar (at Union) from 12 pm to 5 pm. All the authors will be there, so you can get a full complement of signatures on your new book, and the authors will read from their work. There should also be a Q&A session for the curious.

I hope to see you there!

No Such Thing, John Mayer
Hood, Stephen Lawhead
file under: books , celebration , reallife , writings Posted by Jen at 12:40 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I always did like Matrices

OMG I BOUGHT A CAR.

Well, almost. Financing still has to be worked out. But for all purposes I have a used Toyota Matrix. It's bright red. LIKE WHOA.

I always have to pause when I refer to multiple Matrix cars. I know, since I went through the lovely engineering math classes at WU that the plural of matrix is matrices but I don't know how many other people do, and I feel silly saying "Matrixes," but that's how most folks would pluralize it...I can't figure out which one to say. And I suppose it's silly, since I've only bought one...you get the picture. Regardless, matrices were something I actually understood in Engineering Maths...course, show me one now and I don't think I could do much of anything with it. But at least I have a cool car.

Dunno, do I look like a red Matrix girl? No? Too bad. That's what I've got

'Twill be expensive. Looks like no more Borders runs for Jen...but I'm writing my own, right? Oh Lord please let this be the right decision!

Faith, Sheila Nicholls
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets--have to reread in time for the last book!
file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 12:25 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Go Cards!

So yeah. This is just a silly entry, really, I just wanted to cheer for my hometown team, since they're playing another playoff game tonight. It's at home but of course it's supposed to rain tonight. Lovely. I'll just make sure I don't watch, and they should win! Right? Right.

I just discovered Ryan Cabrera. His song On the Way Down has been getting a little airplay on Y98 and I liked it enough to get it on iTunes...then I sampled the other songs and pronounced it good enough to get the cd. Which I now have (you can too), and since ELISAs are the most boring thing and take the longest time in the world, I've listened to it several times already today. Check it out. The record is produced by John Rzeznik of the Goo Goo Dolls (and he contributes a few background vocals) so it's pretty cool from the start.

One of these days I'm going to get Songs about Jane and II. Once I stop spending money on frivolous purchases. I really need to actively save for that new laptop/keyboard/digital camera. Meh. Hopefully essentially closeting myself in my room in front of my comp (please please stop flickering, monitor!) for NaNoWriMo will keep me out of the stores. Yeah. Need to write an outline for that, btw. Soon. Just as soon as I get some of the homework done for orgo. Ugh. Another test in a week and a half or something like that. Damn. Did I mention how the days were going by quickly?

Ryan Cabrera: Echo Park

file under: getmoving , reallife Posted by Jen at 2:29 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Weddings; melancholie; fangirl moment

So, Julie Nollmann's wedding was last night. She's now Julie Elder. It's always sweet to find out that the couple has been together a long time...apparently they knew each other from high school and have been dating all through college...Julie is the younger sister of one of my life-long friends, Jennifer (yes, another Jenny) and I never really did stuff with her that wasn't with Jennifer as well, since most of those things were Girl Scouts-related or such...but she's a nice person and Matt (everyone seems to be getting married to Matthews lately) seems like a very good guy and they looked so happy together. Many best wishes and congratulations to the Elders.

I had a good time dancing at the reception afterwards, but there's just something to seeing your name+ guest on the namecard and not having a guest. Oh, I could have called some people I suppose but it just seems strange to invite someone you don't see that often to a wedding. maybe I'm a prude. more likely I'm just scared. And seeing the couples there...it's hard. I get pretty lonely. Quite a few of my friends have gotten married or engaged recently and my mom keeps asking me why I don't call so and so. I guess it just really raises my hackles when someone tries matchmaking with me...I don't like it, but I know that it's probably the only way I'll meet someone...just...don't tell me that I should go do something with someone because I'll be stubborn. Character flaw I guess.

But on a lighter note, if you thought you'd heard the last of LotR stuff you are so wrong. Here's a spoiler-filled preview of what you can expect on the RotK special extended edition, coming out in time for christmas...Detailed ROTK Special Edition Spoilers! :: RingBearer.org :: J.R.R. Tolkien fan community It makes me happy. More LotR is good.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 10:31 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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The Perseids are coming!

From Meteor Watching 101: Tips and terms

Meteor Watching Tips

> The part of Earth where dawn is breaking is always at the leading edge of our planet's plunge along its orbital path around the Sun. This part of the planet tends to "catch" oncoming meteors left by a comet, whereas the other side of Earth, where it is dusk or late evening, outruns the debris. For that reason, the hours between midnight and dawn are typically the best time to watch a meteor shower.
> Allow time for your eyes to adjust to darkness. A good hour is smart, so that you can also practice some prior to prime observing time.
> Dress warmer than you think you need to, especially in winter.
> Bring a lounge chair or blanket, so you can relax and look up with ease.
> During meteor showers, shooting stars appear to emanate from a point in the sky called the radiant. There are different ideas about how to use this fact to aid in spotting meteors. Robert Lunsford has these thoughts:
One idea is that it is preferable to look away from the radiant so that the shower meteors you see will be longer and therefore easy to detect motion. As Mark Davis stated one should look 20-40 degrees distant. At this distance the radiant is still in your field of view so that shower association is still fairly easy.
Those who look directly at the radiant can see shower activity travel in any direction. Shower association will be fairly obvious. Meteors that appear near the radiant will be foreshortened and therefore the motion will be more difficult to detect.

I would suggest that new observers face slightly away from the radiant. Those who enjoy good perception over a large field of view may be able to directly face the radiant with no problems. Those who prefer to face the radiant must not do so unless the radiant is at least 50 degrees high in the sky. If you don't then you are wasting the bottom portion of your field of view on the ground!

Apparently the best time for viewing in our area is around August 11-12, between midnight and dawn. Anyone want to go stargazing with me?

On the downside of life we were beaten severely at the game last night. The team we played was the first team to make us lose, back in the beginning of summer, and I hate their false advertising: they call themselves the Drunken Idiots when they most certainly are not. Argh. Mostly bad plays and several innings where we just hit to their players. Unless the ball was hit to left field, in which they had a stunning outfielder who covered all of left field and could do it, catching every long ball that went even remotely left. Argh. I did make it home once, but only batted four times. Almost caught a really high ball but I plead sun and general ineptness. I put my head down. Bah. Did make a really nice grounder bounce catch for an out at second, and a couple of pitcher/shortstop plays to second, but yeah. Not so hot out there, we were.

On the upside, grilling tonight! Friends over tonight! Harry's is a good place to eat at even when you've lost! Softball players like the Moonlight Ramble too! I actually have root beer and vanilla ice cream for a root beer float! Score!

Enough exclaimation points for you?

file under: getmoving , reallife Posted by Jen at 9:46 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Two truths and a lie

You guys have heard of the icebreaker game Two Truths and a Lie, right? It's pretty simple. I tell you three statements and you have to figure out which one isn't true. Find more at DNW 2Truth1Lie!

Before you read this entry, check out this picture of me so you know what I look like. For those of you who know me pretty well (or can read this website), this won't be hard to figure out.

I actually did this icebreaker when I was a junior in college living in the new (at the time) Nemerov dorm. All the students living there got together in the huge lounge and we did a couple of these things...of course, we all forgot the people on other floors' names as soon as we went back to our own, but it was a good idea at the time... and I have to say, no one figured it out.

So here you go, my three statements:

1. Both my parents are artists and work in the art field.
2. I majored in Biomedical Engineering.
3. I am half Cherokee Indian, half Caucasian.

(See why I had you look at the picture?)

Number 3 is the lie. I am only a very small percentage Cherokee...my mother is the last person genologically to qualify for the American Indian scholarship, had she done so, and she's something like 1/256 Cherokee I'm actually half Chinese, half english-french-irish-scottish and the tiny bit of aforementioned american indian. You'd have probably figured this out if you read the sidebar information...but no one at that icebreaker could wrap their minds around the fact that the daughter of two artists would major in BME, a super-scientific field. Well, I did, and here I am not using it

Aspire II has been updated. Fixed that silly picture "x" as well. Still need to work on the mini pages. Need to fix stuff on the Dreamer pages. Need to add content, cd list, dvd list. Eventually.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 12:49 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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uncle johnnie loved the rain

which is fitting, I suppose, because it rained during his funeral. Today, I cried. Hot tears that hurt as the forced their way past my lashes. Too many people were hurting to not be empathetic. My mom was shaking so hard I was scared something would happen to her. And Nick...he just stands there like a talk dark shape and just looks heartsick. I can't even imagine how Aunt Roberta feels, with her empty bed.

But I know he was loved. The visitation last night lasted four hours and it had to. There were people there the whole time. Nick's friends from school came. Old teachers came. Friends from his work. From his older work. He touched so many lives.

I believe...that my life's gonna see...the love I give...returned to me...

and you know how strong emotion can lead to excessive creativity?

What's the weather like in heaven?
I bet it's always perfect.
Down here it's raining.
But you loved the rain, so maybe that's perfect too.

I hope one day to meet you there, and we'll have more to talk about than the weather.
of coures, to be talking to you at all would be all I need.

I can't check the weather in heaven--
but I hope you can see the stars.
Keep an eye on our weather.
you know it likes to change.
and wehn the sun comes out again,
we'll know you're smiling at us.

I think I'll go play in the rain.

I miss you, Uncle Johnnie. We all do.

{Ed. Note: this is last friday's entry. x-posted from my LJ because my server was down last week. Deal.}

file under: reallife , serious Posted by Jen at 9:30 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I'm feeling a little angry today

Today is my uncle's memorial. It'll also be a rather busy day, which sucks. Hopefully I'll be able to leave in time to make it to the funeral parlor. I don't even like to think about that. But I noticed that I was annoyed at little things on the way to work. And someone nearly rear-ended me during the drive. Wouldn't that have been a great way to start the morning.

Does it make me a bad person that one of the first things I thought about after I was told that he died was, who's going to do the website? It's terrible. At least I feel a little better because I wasn't the only one thinking of that. Luckily we were able to figure out who hosted my mom's site (and the gallery site that my mom, aunt and uncle were going to set up) and hopefully there is some way we can get them to give us the information so we can keep them going.

sigh. I guess I should get on that busy work day...I'm already late as it is.

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Orlando is good for english class--and on a more sombre note

Or at least my literature-reading betterment. I just finished Ned Kelly (aka Our Sunshine, the book that the eponymous movie is based on) and I'm starting the Iliad today. Yes, I am reading an ancient classic for fun. I'll try to, anyway. Alex says I'll like it. And you know the reason I read or will read these books is because there's a hot guy called Orlando Bloom in the movies...so now I have a glorious face to put with the characters Yes, I know, it's a silly reason to read lit books but hey. I've got to get excited about something.

Btw: Ned Kelly is a really good book. It took me half a day to finish only because I spent three hours and twenty minutes yesterday seeing Return of the King for the fourth time. Yes folks, it's true, I have now been in a theater for thirteen hours and twenty minutes because I love that movie so much. I reserved my copy of RotK on dvd this weekend (along with spending lots and lots of money at the mall--bad jen!) and I'll get an exclusive Aragorn figurine on may 25 when I go pick it up. That date can't come too soon. Unlike Leo I can watch movies over and over and over again And in case you're wondering...yes, it's still good. Even if Legolas is Captain Obvious. I've heard he'll have more (meaningful) lines in the extended edition (which is still (!) scheduled for a Christmas release ;-P).

And on a much different note. My uncle as you may or may not know has been battling pancreatic cancer for a goodly while now, and my mom just told me that it's gotten worse. So if you're the praying type I'd really appreciate your help. And go out and give blood because he's used up about ten people's so far.

You can tell it took me a while to get this whole entry down. I called my mom in the middle of it. Funny how you can go from rather content to pretty depressed so quickly.

file under: lordoftherings , reallife Posted by Jen at 1:25 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Sushi and Seduction

Heh. Did I get your attention? Actually those are two totally unrelated items, but you know me, I love alliteration and a catchy subject line.
Anyway, both items pertaining to the title happened Wednesday night, so I guess they are somewhat connected.

So, re: sushi...never had it before wednesday. Leo loves it, and other people I've talked to really like it, so putting my childhood bias about eating raw fish aside, I decided to let myself try it. Kenichi (the funny Japanese guy who isn't in our lab but does a lot of experiments with us anyway) was taking Mark (the now part-time guy tech in the lab) out to dinner. Not sure why, and they're the type of guys who can't say two words without insulting each other, but neither seems to mind. Anyway, going out to dinner, and I got invited. We were thinking about the Cheesecake factory, which would have been great, but then Mark mentioned how he liked japanese food so we decided to go to Sekisui, a relatively new place on Grand. When I told them I'd never had it before that pretty much sealed it. And I must admit, it was pretty good. We had a LOT of food! Eel, flat fish fin muscle (eep, but good), california rolls, dragon rolls, spider rolls...st louis rolls! I am not quite sure what was in all of these things, but they were good regardless. Now, I'm not a big fan of fish in the first place, so I probably won't be going again soon...also it's expensive! I caught a glimpse of the check and it was over $100...thank goodness Kenichi is a nice guy and paid for it We managed to finish off everything we got, and Mark said something along the lines of 'I didn't think you'd be able to eat all that.' eh. From him, who eats all the time, I guess it was sort of a compliment...didn't quite know how to take it. Whatever. We were all hungry by the time the food finally got there! So final verdict: good, but will probably never be my first choice.

And re: seduction, I finally got the new Laurell K Hamilton book from the library: Seduced by Moonlight. Kate will be happy to know that I read it in two days, including working hours. It's a pretty quick read. A good story, this is the third book in the Merry Gentry series. This series is the 'other' series LKH writes, and I still like the Anita Blake books better, but she does have a way of grabbing onto your interest and not letting go. I'm glad I didn't buy this one, however. It was just a little too short and didn't really...end, I guess. I will say that LKH is very good at making you want to know what's going to happen in the next book and makes you want to know now! sigh.

I'm a little peeved at this moment because I just found out that the last book I have on request arrived at the library today. Unfortunately the library is only open til 5 on fridays so even if I left now it would be a stretch to make it on time. And since Mom's art show is tomorrow it's doubtful that I'll be able to make it then either...ah well. I WILL pick up Fool's Fate and learn what happens to FitzChivalry. It just might be monday before I can launch into that one...which is probably a good thing, considering I still have four other books to read that I've kept out for nearly three weeks now. Newton's Cannon is suprisingly good for an alternate scientific universe yarn.

One of these days I'll figure out the amazon plugin so I can *ahem* plug those books.

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Late again

I just found out that the University College at my alma mater is offering an english lit class on Tolkien. Of course, registration started quite a while ago and the class is full. sigh. I could have gotten excited about that one. Maybe they'll offer it again, as this is the first time there's been a class like that...maybe next fall. I just love how I can't take anything that doesn't require a previous semester of class or that damn Organic Chemistry that I should have taken when I was in school. Gaaah! I don't want to be late anymore.

Perhaps that's why I ran...because it was something I could be first at. Something I could win. As long as you ran the race there was no way you could be late. Just last. and thank goodness I was never that.

Well, there's always tap dance, but I somehow doubt that the lab would like paying for that one. Having nothing at all to do with science, etc.

I want to take advantage of the tuition remission benefit that I get for working here...though since I (and my parents) have put so much into the school already doesn't it make sense that I should be able to take a class or two for free?

Mom keeps saying that if I paid as much attention to the things I do at work and back in school as I do to the Lord of the Rings I'd be much better off, and it's true. *sigh* Tell me again why no one wants to just pay me to write? Oh yeah, my standards are too high. Blah. I'm getting that scared feeling again about work. You know, am I doing well enough, am I working hard enough, am I learning anything that's worth what they're paying me? I even had a dream with some of my coworkers last night. It was a little offputting and for some reason had the gold medallion from Pirates in it. Go fig. I wasn't even watching Pirates last night. Foreboding.

*forlorn* why isn't the layout working?

file under: reallife , working Posted by Jen at 6:35 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Happy Birthday, Mom

Well, my mom is officially 50. I wish I could have gotten on yesterday and posted, but y'all knew already, right? I spent yesterday with her. Whee! It's good when your parents love you. She seemed happy with my gifts, which makes me happy, and we had some wonderful food, including this really good chocolate mousse cake with funky ruffled chocolate on top. Mmm. So,

Happy 50th, Mom!

a little late.

It's my MyPoints anniversary today...I like this thing because you literally check your email and they give you points. You never have to buy a thing. Of course, it takes a lot longer to save for anything, but I'm waiting for my $50 gift certificate...check it out, and if you decide to sign up, tell 'em JLSHEW sent ya. wink

The Haunted Mansion and Timeline come out today, both of which I want to see and neither of which I'm likely to see until after thanksgiving. Ah well. I have so much to do tonight...clean the bathroom, take out the trash, dishes, pack for the trip...sigh. When am I gonna watch my shows? lol. Yes, I know I'm obsessed. Although not quite as obsessed as I am about LotR. The official soundtrack site was finally updated so I bought my Internet-only special edition...I can't wait! I've heard clips and it sounds wonderful.

Got the Matrix Revolutions soundtrack and Sarah McLachlan's new cd...I'll let you know if I like them.

I can't wait for Pirates on dvd! I'll have to find out how much it's selling for...I'd like to have it on 'the day' if possible wink If you find good prices let me know!

Yay for holiday breaks. I'm so happy. Whee turkey!

file under: celebration , reallife Posted by Jen at 10:46 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Chalk this one up to life experience

Get ready, this is gonna be a long one.

Early thursday morning (around 1 am) I was mugged (technical term: strongarmed) right outside my apartment. I had just gotten out of my car which was parked a little farther away from the building than I liked. I sat in the car for a bit after I parked because I had picked stuff up from my parents' house and had to gather it out of the passenger seat. When I got out and shut the door, I heard leaves rustling and looked towards the other side of the street, where a black man had just come out between two cars. I thought he was just going to a car, but started getting my key to the apartment ready in any case. I was wearing gloves which made it a little more difficult, and a hat which might have been why I didn't hear him cross the street until he was right behind me.

He grabbed me from behind and I (in total disbelief that he actually did it) started screaming-loudly. Somehow he pushed me to the ground as he tried to shut me up, and kept saying, 'where's the money, where's the money.' At one point he forced my chin up so I couldn't open my mouth (and nearly couldn't breathe) but I guess I moved enough that he pushed me onto my back. I tried biting his hand but I don't know if I actually got anything...but it got him angry enough that he pushed me down...and left my legs free. So I kicked him in the head. Or at least something in that general vicinity wink Now while this sounds wonderful, it made him mad so he clocked me just above my ear. This understandably slowed me down!

Luckily by this time some neighbors had heard me screaming and called the police. A guy who lives across the street came out with a baseball bat when he determined that it really was a mugging (as opposed to just a friendly wrestling match, which I totally understand) and the guy ran off. I curled up on the concrete for a short time just to make sure I was ok...realized the guy broke my glasses, which pissed me off. A girl who lived in my building had heard the commotion but didn't (understandably) want to come out, in her pjs, alone, against a rather bigger man. She didn't have shoes on, and I remember telling her to get off the concrete and realizing I was still lying on same. The police came very quickly after that, and I gave a report, and the policeman walked me back to the apartment. I called my parents and told them the news...they took it pretty well, all things considered. Then I called Leo and Alex and asked them to come over from Alex's because I didn't want to be alone that night. Realize that it was close to 2 am by that time. Thank you guys for abusing your sleep time for me wink

Now for the ever-growing experiment in irony that is my life...

Bear with me, these get long, but they do have points.

Irony #1: The day had been very windy, windy enough that the power went out at the apartment. The main reason I had stopped by my parents' place was that I had to drop off a book I'd just finished (remember Quicksilver?) that was two days overdue. Because of the aforementioned power outage, I had to read the last thirty pages by candle- and flashlight, making me late for home and later returning to the apartment. Now, I know I've mentioned how loquatious Mr. Stephenson is...the book is 900+ pages and has a good heft...I actually weighed it: 5+ pounds. It was too big to fit in my bag, so I had been carrying it from my car to work and vice versa, always thinking that if anyone did try to jump me I'd have a ready weapon to bash their head in. So of course when I did get jumped, I had just returned the book. Sigh.

Irony #2: Earlier in the day I had gone home to be there when my Josh Groban cd arrived (see previous entry), enjoyed it, and had it in the cd player in my car. I got it out of the player when I got back to my apartment (which was part of the reason I was in the car so long...I suspect the guy saw me sitting in the car getting stuff and assumed I had something of value, which I guess I did, but...more on that later) and had it and a flyer and a pair of jeans I'd left at home in my hand. Now if you know me you know that I have only a few of the characteristics of my zodiac sign, Virgo, one of them being a slight analness about little things, like spine-cracking on books and scratches on cds. Well, obviously, the cd got scratched in the scuffle. It looked worse than it was at first, as the cd seems to play just fine in all my players. But still. 12 hours before it had been pristine...point being that I'd had it for such a short time and it was already messed up, and it was just the sort of cd I didn't want messed up. I stepped on my Two Towers soundtrack last year (on the way to a Two Towers screening--how's that for irony, eh?) when I was so desperately trying to keep it nice...and here goes another cd. Meh.

Random bits: I was a bit embarrassed because I could have easily sprinted to my apartment, being a track star, don't you know. But then I think that even if I'd made it to the door, I'd still have to unlock it, and that takes time, most likely enough that the guy would have caught me anyway. I was worried at one point afterwards that he had taken my wallet, but it turned out to just have fallen out of my pocket, and I remember thinking (when I thought it was lost) 'aw man, there goes that cute new wallet (I'd only had it a few months)' and then I was like, 'aw crap, I have to get a new driver's lisence, debit card,' &c. And you know that thing about just giving them the money...I didn't even think about that, and I know it would have galled me to do so, so I suppose it's for the best that it fell out wink I didn't know that I could scream so high or so loud...guess those years of choir helped me out...and now I know what it feels like to be punched, or elbowed, or whatever it was he delivered to my head. It didn't really hurt that much, to be honest, it was just suprising, another thing to add to the list of 'I can't believe this is happening.'

I spent yesterday getting new glasses (and to be honest about that, I'm not sure if I broke them or he broke them, all I know is that they somehow ended up in my hands with one earpiece bent totally to the side and both lenses out) which left me a couple hundred dollars poorer and slightly weirded out, because it's been at least six years since I had a new frame. It takes some getting used to, you know, different frame color and different shape to the lenses...Of course, even though I went to Lenscrafter's which boasts 'Glasses in about an hour' they didn't have my power of lens so it took rather longer than that. I had entertained the idea of going into work for a little bit but I didn't have to, and I ended up back at my parents' house sleeping in a chair in the living room. Needless to say I was a little tired after that!

I've got one of those alarms that you pull to make a really loud noise on my keychain now, and you can be sure I'll have my keys ready when I get out of the car. Who knows if the guy will ever be caught, but I hope I did get him in the head and I hope he has a lump somewhere on his noggin too. I still can't believe it happened, to me...I mean, it's almost funny. And all the what-ifs and 'if I had done this, would it have been better'...I keep thinking about it, but you know what? I'm not going to let it bother me. I'm gonna get on with life. The apartment is too nice to give up (and I really don't want to break my lease), and honestly, it didn't even occur to me to get out of the area. I like it and don't want this incident to ruin that. Ah well. Three cheers to Girl Scouts and all the people who showed me how to defend myself. I'm rather proud I prevailed...and the guy didn't even accomplish his objective. So I'll learn from this, and pass my knowledge onto you (and if you've read this far I commend you)...Look around you, especially late at night. Give them the money (if you can remember where you put it), have your keys ready. Run like hell if terrain and circumstances allow it. Try to remember everything you can about the attacker. Got that? Good.

Thanks for caring. Feel free to make me feel better by utilizing the links to my wishlists wink

file under: reallife , serious Posted by Jen at 5:10 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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ridiculous ways to spend money

I would join Friends of Josh Groban if I wasn't such a cheapskate. Er. I mean, if I didn't have to pay for rent, the car inspection, new tires, license renewal, the heinous first phone bill, and getting ready for the halloween/housewarming party we're having on saturday. Meh. Perhaps I'll join when I know that I'll have enough money to last the rest of the month. One of these days I should join the John Mayer fan club as I really do like him...not that I don't like Josh Groban. I've absolutely fallen in love with his new single 'Oceano' (you can listen to it at joshgroban.com), it's just the most wonderful thing ever. Excepting the LotR soundtracks, of course. I keep waiting for the information about pre-ordering the special edition soundtrack to come out...just like I'm waiting for the RotK calendar info to come out. Silly people, don't they know we're impatient?

Matrix Revolutions comes out next week, which is exciting. And soon after that the extended edition of TTT comes out. I really need to get a dvd player. Or a computer with a dvd player. And call me crazy, but I want to get an iBook with the Panther OS X. And it's that sort of thing where theoretically I have the money for all these things, but what happens if something comes up down the road? I mean, I was even responsible and turned down a premiere screening of RotK out in california because it would cost about a thousand bucks. A little more than a computer. Meh. And I still don't have the computer.

I love special edition soundtracks or cds, but it's that extra $10 that I hate. I'll still end up buying them, and most likely online because there are super-special editions only available online, and possibly like last year I'll get the RotK soundtrack a few days before it was released. Erm. Someone could always be nice and provide me with a gift certificate or two...

and in a little over a month the Pirates of the Caribbean dvd comes out. Sheesh. Hollywood just keeps coming up with ways to part me from my money, most of it hard-earned.

Another random note: while I'm glad the concept of streaming music was invented, now I REALLY want this Oceano song. Sigh.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 6:32 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Do I want to be a doctor?

Luigi suggested I look into medical school. So I did. It sure would be nice to say "Hi. I'm Dr. Shew" someday (although I always thought that sounded sort of strange). When I was little I was sure I was gonn amake it to the highest degree I could. I never knew how much work it would be.

And then we come to the main reason I didn't apply to medical school: I did not take any organic chemistry classes. I was so thankful that orgo wasn't required for biomedical engineering students...and honestly I don't know where I would have fit it in. But I believe every medical school out there requires it for admission. And a year (or 8 credits) no less...which means I couldn't even get it over with in a summer. I knew I should have taken a class this fall...although I don't know if orgo was available in the evenings. meh.

It's not like I would have to get it done as soon as possible...I won't even be applying until next fall if even that soon. But I find it extremely ironic that the class I was so glad I didn't have to take may now keep me from trying for med school. Because honestly, med school is looking much more attractive than grad school. I don't know if I can see myself as a PhD. You make more money as a doctor anyway...and less of a chance of having to write a thesis. That thesis part really scares me.

As does the thought of all the memorization that's required in both orgo and med school. I wonder if I'd be like the med students on 'er' who go gangbusters for a while then drop off the show because they couldn't hack it. Yep, scared of the future. Why do you think I procrastinate so much? I'm futurephobic.

Sigh. Anyone out there take orgo? Any hints or tips? The word just scares me too. I'm a wimp when I think about going back to school.

random thought: I was always one of the young ones in school because of where my birthday fell. But if I go back to school now I'll be one of the old ones. Hmm.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 5:01 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Weird feeling

I'm feeling a little depressed and I'm not sure why. I mean, I've got this new apartment and all...I guess it's the spending money that's worrying me, with all the new bills and such. And I guess I'm a little homesick. And work's been busy so I'm a little wonky with that. Ah well.

I found Cryptonomicon, btw. It was hiding behind my LotR Fanclub membership kit.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 10:34 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Sleepover

\\In unrelated news, FanForum is back! Yay!

So I moved my mattresses over to the apartment. I slept there last night...it was odd, having my bed but not being home...and I felt really weird not being able to get online. You know, I had the computer, but not the internet access...that and not being able to watch cable on my little black and white tv wink I'm thinking I might get a tv/vcr combo for the room, I don't know. I guess I'll have to go grocery shopping first before I think about electronics. And that might be interesting as the main grocery store chains in Missouri are going on strike today. Sheesh.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 1:51 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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More excitement than I needed today

I was helping Eduardo swim the rats today and while taking one out of the swimming tanks, it bit me...twice. Rats! I'm ok, the rats aren't testing diseases or anything. Just washed it out and had it checked out by the employee health service...don't get me wrong, it's not pretty. But I'm gonna be fine. They gave me a tetanus shot just to be sure...I know I was up to date for college, but I can't tell you how up to date I was at the time. The booster will probably hurt more than the bite will tomorrow. Bleah. Ah well. I guess we'll check the weights on the tails before we take them out next time! Sigh.

We should have gas in the apartment and the new phone line is in...it's a very easy to remember number with lots of 7s in it smile Though Alex has more. How exciting! Maybe I'll get more moved in tonight after the wb season premieres. We'll see...

Isn't anyone else out there interested in going to all three of the LotR movies when RotK comes out? I'm very much looking forward to spending the day at the movie theatre wink

file under: lordoftherings , reallife Posted by Jen at 3:41 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Here's a good distraction

The Return of the King trailer is here! Go watch 2 and a half minutes of goodness. I have to admit the absurd font of joy that spouted from me after watching this the first time. Eeek! December 17th seems so far away!

Things are coming together for the apartment. We'll get gas and phone service soon so the place will actually be liveable wink I still have to figure out what to do for a bed though. I've had some experience with futons and I'm just not sure if I like them or not. Didn't have too good of a night's sleep...but if I take the mattresses from home then what happens if I want to visit my parents/they want to make my room a guest bedroom? Bah. Whatever. I need a dresser and a desk as well. Wonder where they'll go. And I want to buy some Legolas posters for decoration big grin and I'll have to think up a scheme! Whoo. Let's go spend some cash!

file under: lordoftherings , reallife Posted by Jen at 4:31 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Movin' out

Well, Leona and I turned in our applications for the apartment we saw yesterday. It's funny but of course you know my life is ironic...it was the last apartment we saw, it wasn't the one we were actually going to see cause that one was taken...and my aunt showed us the place. And it's nice to know someone in the biz cause the owner agreed to knock $100 off the rent it originally goes for. It's still more expensive than we wanted, but it's a great apartment. Stained glass entry doors, a sunroom, a nice living room (with a fireplace that doesn't work, but there's always candles) the bedrooms are the same size or thereabouts (and one has a bay window! Yay!) a nice bathroom with two sinks, and a new kitchen. There's a deck out back and in the center of all these buildings there's a community garden. And it's where we wanted it, close enough to both the Hilltop and the Med School...whoohoo.

So now we have to wait to see if the credit check goes through...might not, for me...I have no credit, really, unless you count me always paying my loans on time...but we should be able to move in late next week. Yay. Course, that means I have to a) clean up my room and figure out what's going with me and what I can trash and b) go shopping for things like dressers and bedframes. That should be exciting...not going to make any profit for the next couple of paychecks...

Underworld comes out today. In honor of this, you should read Decadence (what's up of it, anyway) and I swear I started writing that before I had any idea such a movie was being made.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 2:08 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Heavier Things

Finally got the new john mayer cd! It's great as I expected. It'll be on repeat for a while...

\\so I'll check the weather wherever you are

Cause I wanna know if you can see the stars tonight

It might be my only right\\

-Split Screen Sadness

\\So fathers, be good to your daughters

Daughters will love like you do

Girls become lovers who turn into mothers

So mothers, be good to your daughters too\\

-Daughters

\\And if you never stop when you wave goodbye

You just might find if you give it time you will wave hello again

You just might wave hello again

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now

that's the way this wheel keeps working now

You can't love too much one part of it

I believe that my life's gonna see

The love I give returned to me\\

-Wheel

Looked at a couple of apartments yesterday. Who knows what will come of that. It sure would be nice to have an apartment all to myself...er to me and my roommate. She needs one ASAP. We'll look more this weekend. Saw my uncle last night. He moved to a room out of the ICU but now they're trying to find a bed for him in another hospital so he can have some sort of procedure to find the bleeding. He was doing ok for a while but then he had to have another transfusion and he needs to be transfusion free for two weeks before this other procedure. Aie.

Thank Goodness it's Friday. This week has been too long. I need more sleep. Alas, back to work I go.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 11:58 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Unwell

There are only a few of you out there that know this, but my uncle has cancer. He didn't find out for sure until about a month ago when his stomach felt so bad he couldn't eat. By the time they checked it the cancer was very advanced (stage IV) and had spread to other areas. He's fighting it as he can, but they can't do surgery. I think he was going to have chemotherapy but I'm not sure there weren't some complications with that as well.

But we got a call this morning that he'd been rushed to the hospital last night because he felt so sick...and he's still there. I don't know what's happening because callous as it sounds, I had to get to work. My cousin is staying home from school today. My mom was crying on the phone.

I don't know what to do, how to feel. I don't want to think of him dying, because that would be pessimistic and I try not to be. I want him to stay with us. His family needs him...we need him. But I don't want to be totally unprepared for shock. People don't die in our family...at least, no one I'm close to has yet. I don't want a trend to start. Prayer is a good place to start, I suppose. But then I get into that 'am I right with God' feeling that always makes me uncomfortable. Sheesh. I don't think there's a comfortable way to feel about this.

He got those tickets to the Lion King because he was working for someone who found out he was sick. Usually I love irony, but not this much.

file under: reallife , serious Posted by Jen at 9:32 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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well, I'm here

in lovely San Diego for Comic-Con. I can't believe we're actually here. It seems odd that after so long of talking about it that it's finally being done. Preview night was last night, there looks like there's some great stuff there. Can't wait to see celebrities smile

I'm really tired, which isn't so odd, but my contacts did something to my eyes so that it hurts to have them open for too long. Or at least the left eye. So I can see out of one eye...I should get an eyepatch before we see Pirates tonight. lol. We'll meet up with another Arrow for dinner and the movie smile

We did decide to get internet access, which is grand. I don't understand why I have to clean out hundreds of spam messages...stupid spam. why do people do it? bleh.

I did a bad thing and didn't arrange how to meet up with the person I'm doing the skit with. sigh. I don't even know where she's staying or what the name of her booth is or what her last name is...meh. there could be trouble then. eek. what if I had to do it by myself? and what if my eyes aren't ok for the blue contacts, or any contacts for that matter? yesh. I'm not going to worry about that right now because I'm going to take a nap. Maybe when I wake up everything will be better.

file under: lordoftherings , reallife Posted by Jen at 4:25 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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bumper car

but first, time for something completely different:

Isn't this cool?

So the car was theoretically supposed to be finished today. All clean and spiffy and still looking used, but with a working trunk and bumper. Of course, they had just gotten in a few of the parts this morning, so of course it wasn't ready yet. Ah well. I didn't want to drive today anyway. It's funny cause the original part they got in was for the slightly later version of the car with taillights across the trunk. Except for that the two models are exactly alike, so it's easy to see how they made the mistake, but sheesh. We got to see the almost finished car without back trunk panel or bumper, and let me tell you, that's an odd looking car. At least they were able to re-use the taillights. Still amazes me that the lights didn't break. Small favors I suppose.

points excitedly to sidebar

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 8:27 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Powerless

So if you read the previous entry you know I was rear-ended on tuesday morning. (Speaking of days of the week, I've been so confused on what day it was all week. I kept thinking yesterday was tuesday, I guess because tuesday felt so much like a monday...) Anyway, I'm alright, my neck is a little sore, I should probably call the doctor right now and try to get an appointment, blah blah. But on top of all that, tuesday night about 7:15 pm our power went out. We'd actually gotten through the worst of the storm that had started a little after 5:30 (just after I got home and was able to tape a drop cloth over the gaping hole in the back of my car, natch) and my mom and I were watching Sister Act 2 when the power suddently went out. Gaaaah. It was out for 25 and a half hours. We haven't gotten to go through the freezers yet, hopefully some of it is salvageable...what a pain. Although I did get to break out some of my very nice smelling candles and attempt to read by candlelight.

We ate outside cause obviously no air was moving inside...it's eerie how quiet a house/neighborhood can be when there's no power. Also no fan at night to provide white noise. Needless to say I didn't sleep well that night, what with the silence and my neck being sore.

but all's well...it came back on while we were eating dinner, of course less than an hour after my dad had gone to the store so we'd have something to eat and some ice to keep the leftovers from going bad...I love irony, really. Good thing, because there seems to be a lot of that lately...

I think I've had a great week, don't you?

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 8:43 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I don't believe it

Well, it's official, I've had *my* first car accident, on my way to work. Not my fault. It's rainy and slippery today and I was stopped at a stoplight in the right-hand left turn lane, with cars to the left and a median to the right, and a Jeep Liberty sliding toward me in the rear-view mirror. Eeek! I had enough time to think that car isn't stoppi--oh shit!

Irony no. 1: This is my second week being a full-time driver with my own car insurance (nothing should happen to it as it's not my fault).

Irony no. 2: The accident occurred in front of an old auto repair shop with a sign reading "Collision repair center" directly across the street from where it happened.

Sigh. And here we were hoping that the Saturn wouldn't need any repairs while we got the new car paid off. The trunk is bashed in on the left side and won't open, but miraculously the taillight casings are intact. The left one is loose, but intact. The left passenger door could be a little sticky, but the car is driveable if you don't mind the rather gaping hole where rain could get in...Thank goodness it wasn't my fault (and I didn't hit the car in front of me) and thank goodness for seatbelts and thank God I'm ok. Nothing broken except the car; I can't tell if I'm going to be sore because of nerves or because of the accident. So worry not, I'm ok, just a little shaky. But I'll take your gifts or monetary donations or Amazon wishlist fulfillments joyfully wink

file under: reallife , serious Posted by Jen at 9:06 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Surviving

Work's going pretty well. I'm really leaning in the direction of an apartment. Course, the apartment means I have to buy the Saturn and pay all the insurance for it, and then a monthly rent check...and actually buying food every week! Eh. Money goes too fast. Esp. when you go to bookstores on whims and buy $60 more than you spent on clothes. Yes. I know. book freak. I often wonder how many books I have...perhaps it's reached a thousand. I certainly have hundreds of cds. I actually made a list of some of them the other night. Over 150 and that's not all of them. Borders was made for me. I could live there if they had better food.

It's funny, cause I can't see myself doing the technician thing forever, but I've got to (sort of) resign myself with doing this for at least a year so I can get maximum benefit. Maybe longer, who knows? And maybe then the super-upper-level education. Who knows? At least I get Memorial day off wink

When I get home I'm gonna start working on the costume again. I've got a fair looking muslin made up, if you ignore the fact that it's too short and the sleeves don't work with it yet...and somehow I have to make up props. A girl emailed me about making a skit for Comic-Con...so I've really got to get cracking!

and now I must be going...time for home!

file under: reallife , working Posted by Jen at 5:30 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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News of the weird

or just news of my life. Here's a roundup of the last week or so.

Saw X2 on opening night with Alex. Great movie. Bang-up beginning and a pretty good ending. I've decided that all these comic-to-movie translations are just going to be open-ended enough to allow for sequels so I can't let it bug me. Nice special effects and a decent plot. Cyclops, man, suck it up. She ain't dead. Wolverine. What can you say about the guy who doesn't die even with a bullet almost in his brain? Storm is cool. Let me just hold up my arms and lightning will come from the stars. lol. Didn't like Jean Grey's haircut. Dunno. Too seventies for me. Liked her part in the end. I like Nightcrawler, even if you couldn't understand him sometimes. I like how they did the transporting effect. Have to say the Matrix Reloaded trailer made more of an effect on me. lol. Can't wait for next thursday. Anyone up for a premiere screening? It just looks cool. The music for the trailer is good too. Remember how I like soundtracks? Spent a few hours at the library today just watching various trailers. I miss broadband so much. Maybe when I get my own apartment I can get cable/dsl. God willing and an actual job. After the car, of course. Oh, and the new computer.

Last weekend sometime I finally got the Da Vinci Code from the library after being on hold for a month or more...it was really good, and really fast, reading. I got it about 3 in the afternoon and had it finished by 3 in the morning. Nice mystery, and I even felt like I might have figured things out before the characters did. Of course, it was probably written that way, but it made me feel good. On the other hand, there were definitely things I did not get, which nearly made me slap myself on the forehead and say "D'oh!" sigh. Go read the book if you're at all interested in art, mystery, the Knights Templar, Goddess theory, or cryptography. Yeah.

It's a week of season finales. I hate and love this period. Usually the ending eps are pretty good, and I suppose the two I've seen have been...Alias season two is over, and we're gonna be wondering about that one for the entire summer. It was nearly as bad as the smallville finale last year. There are so many things that were left hanging. Ah well. There's always reruns, which is good, cause I think I missed a couple of eps.

Angel made its last run tonight, hopefully not for the *very* last time. A pretty good one, with the previous ep actually tying up the loose ends. This one introduced something new to Angel Inc which could be good or bad. Not sure which yet. An ending that pulls on the heartstrings, of course. lol. At least Connor is smart in the end. Went from a oh-my-God-he-did-it to awwww. Watch it and you'll see what I mean. If you must know I'll tell you privately.

Two eps of Buffy left. Forever. And at last, Angel will return to Sunnydale. I don't know what they're gonna do together, since the last time they were "together" only happened in Angel's memories. I think. I have to say I'm a Buffy/Angel shipper, which I only relate to you because...eh. Doesn't really matter, does it? I've always been a conventional shipper. Max/Liz, Buffy/Angel, Rhapsody/Ashe, the way they're supposed to be. Anyway. Intrigued to see how they'll end a show that has had its ups and very downs after seven years. Glad I got to see all of them last year, so I've seen the whole seven seasons. Too bad I'm not a slayer-in-training.

Tuesday I finally had a meeting with the guy from Hanger Prosthetics. Been a busy time. I really like him and the people I met, seems like it could be a great job. But that day before I went to the meeting I got a call from a lab I'd visited a while before and they said they'd like to offer me the job...I find it extremely ironic that once again I have two jobs at the same time. I'll probably end up with the lab job, unless what I learn about it tomorrow proves it's completely wrong for me. And I'll usually try anything once. I'm still interested in the prosthetics lab, which maybe I can work partime or volunteer. We'll see. Wish me luck. I hate making decisions like this.

I've been writing bits and pieces here and there of Moonstone and Decadence. I'm trying. I just haven't been in the writing mood, or if I have, I've been too lazy to fire up the laptop. It's just such a pain to have to transfer from the one to the other. Eh. If only we had a network. Alas. Not to be. I'll try to write as I can. I'll try to sew as I can...made a pretty decent muslin for the silver frock. We'll see what comes of that...and perhaps one day I'll get to the guitar. ah.

Are you bored yet? Be sure to vote for me smile

file under: miscellany , reallife Posted by Jen at 9:32 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Highlight of the month

X-Men 2 comes out today...

Sad when your highlight is a movie premiere.

I still don't have a job. How pathetic is that? And I've really grown to hate it when jobs you apply for never get back to you. Sigh. Pet Peeve #4798.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 12:11 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Please vote. And no, I haven't fallen off the face of the earth

You see those links after this post? Please click them and vote for me. This is an important week! You'd make me very happy.

So I'm trying to be a better daughter and do more about the house and be more sociable with my family. Which is seriously cutting into my internet time. I really need a job and an apartment and a car so I can just have a messy room without bothering anyone. That's not the real reason, I know. I should just be better about helping. Or we should get cable or dsl so the phone line stays open. Whatever.

Point being I won't be on that often. I'd love to get a new layout up for this site, start working on changing it to php, but the comp that has Dreamweaver (and more importantly, Photoshop with web-optimization) is the laptop which no longer has a working AC adapter. Ergo I can't use it for very much longer (it's got about an hour or so of time left in the battery) and hence can't make up a new layout. Also can't use it to write which sucks cause I've got some very good ideas that need to get written. So no moonstone until I can get a new cord. Also sucks cause I was working on a new portfolio site which I really need to get published if I'm serious about a web design job. Sigh. *crosses fingers* please someone like me enough to give me a job.

btw, happy 03-03-03 wink

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 11:06 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I'm alive, really

it just doesn't feel that way. I've been pretty sick lately, not a fun thing to be. I don't know what it is, just that it sucks. But never fear, I'm getting better. Even writing some.

I have two job interviews on Tuesday. Hopefully I'll come to the right job. Cross your fingers. And hope I'm not still sick.

and until the end of the month: Go to the Guidant web site at:

http://www.heartcenteronline.com/goto.cfm?d=441&gdtct=WomenHeart

and click on the red icon and the Guidant Foundation will donate $1.00 to help inform people of this important issue. Heart disease affects everyone...and now you can help in getting the message to those that need to know.

Dear God, keep my parents well.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 8:13 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Still Snowing

which is a good thing. But funny how it's been snowing all day but it still looks like only about an inch hit the ground...sigh.

two weeks! Two weeks till TTT smile mustn't forget the WB special tonight.

file under: lordoftherings , reallife Posted by Jen at 3:32 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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Wrong for Wednesday

but you'll just have to deal. I couldn't do this yesterday.

Two for Tuesday

1. Tell us about your first time you ever kissed someone. Now please, you don't have to limit yourself, we wanna hear allllll about it. You know you want to tell everyone. To be honest, I don't really remember my first kiss. I guess it must have been with Scotty, and I think it was in my house, by the stairs. My frosh year of hs. We both had braces, I think. But he is and Aries and I'm a Virgo, so there was no way that was going to work out. I remember making out with Mark in the short fling, and that was cool...but a bit scary, considering he was muuuuuyyyy different than Scotty. Alt-rock vs. easy listening. And I remember kissing Chris in the park. Or maybe we didn't kiss...we just cuddled. But it still looked compromising when the nun walked by!

2. This one was sort of a toss up. So we'll leave it to your first job. (I'll leave the scandalous questions for later) We have all had those first jobs that we're not proud of, so it's time for everyone to fess up! The first real job must have been at Grone Cafeteria. Not Grone's, although Mr. Grone was my boss, just Grone. Wonderful biscuits and half-price for me. I worked the beverage counter, learned to make coffee and clean filters, for all the good it did me. Never made coffee again in my life. Occasionally worked the hot foods section, rarely the dessert/salad. Wasn't cool enough or math-minded enough to be cashier. Bussed tables once, but did get a tip. Never broke a cup or plate. Spilled plenty of hot coffee on the table, though. I don't have an exciting life. Which is why I write and read.

file under: reallife Posted by Jen at 11:26 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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It always seems to be this way

I perpetually come up against these seemingly unresolveable dilemmas. Maybe it's just cause I remember them more than the little choices you make every day...

so, as you probably know, I have a year of track eligibility left. This means that as long as I'm enrolled in some college, I could run on their track team for one more year. You also might know that I can get 50% off graduate school tuition if I took classes at Wash U. The great thing would be to enroll for the spring semester in some grad program and run. However, the 50% is dependent on working full time. And you have to be a full-time student to be ncaa-eligible. Full-time work + full-time class + running = very long day != Jennifer awake. It would probably be all-around bad, I'd always be sleep-deprived, I probably wouldn't do too well in classes, and I don't know if I could ever top the wonderful (and I'm not being modest here, it was wonderful) season I had last year. But I love to compete, most of the team is back, I'd get to run relays again, maybe do some hurdling, be with friends, and keep in shape.

If nothing else I will try to help the team out, run unattached at some meets, but then I can't do the relays. It's kind of sad that I would entertain the idea of going to grad school just so I could run one more year of track. But I know how much I would miss it, the whole year of eligibility thing resulting from the old coach and I having some differences about my commitment to the sport and me not running sophomore year. It galls me to have a year that I could run and not be able to do anything about it. I could run next year, I know... I have five years after I graduate to use the year. But I wouldn't get to run the relay with Val. And I think it's terrible that I have done hardly anything athletic this summer aside from some bike rides with Sarah. Coach said it well: that's sad for the former Most Outstanding performer. Sigh. So I'm soliciting opinions, but I know some people don't feel the competitive urge, and I know that I'm the one who would have to do it. I want to, but I don't know if I can. That's the crux of the matter, I suppose. The mind is willing but the body will shut down on you. Any advice? Caveat: I might not even be able to enroll in the spring. They might not let me. Still, let me know what you think.

file under: muses , reallife Posted by Jen at 11:56 AM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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I can't believe it's been a year

This time last year I was still in school, hadn't started either of my blogs, hadn't started running the best track season I'd ever have, was still freaking out about Transport phenomena, and didn't know to wish Coach a happy birthday.

I'll light a candle later tonight. Never Forget was the Club 101 phrase of the day. And there's no way I ever could. I guess every generation has its "Kennedy moment" but I wish this one didn't have to be so horrific.

I have deep regret that I never got to go to New York before the towers were destroyed. But I do hope to someday make it to the memorial. I saw it on tv once, the two shining columns of light streaming up to the sky. Never Forget indeed.

life is precious and fleeting: make the most of it. much love to all of you, and my prayers and compassion for the victims and their families. God Bless.

file under: reallife , serious Posted by Jen at 4:46 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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well, I won't forget that one

I have to say, yesterday was one of the most stressful birthdays I've ever had. Not the whole thing, I suppose, but I was up late the eve of my birthday, as you probably realized if you read this yesterday, so I was tired all day. Yun Shin took me to India's Rasoi, an indian buffet, for lunch, which was a little weird in that I've never had indian food before. This is Indian indian not native american indian, in case you weren't sure. It turned out to be ok and the mango custard was especially good. That wasn't the bad part. I mean, I got to leave work early so I could pick up Hallie and get to the DMB concert. The bad part was that traffic sucked, even to get from the med school to Hilltop, and the car, which had just been in the shop that morning, decided to start shaking when we hit the jam that is always in front of the airport. I felt like I was in an E. coli shaker; those are machines that we put the bacterial cultures in so they can grow and get enough air. They're rather violent, and just imagine sitting in a car that's shaking while you're waiting the interminable wait to get to the parking lot. Whoever designed Riverport's lot should be shot. A pox on civil engineers... all of them except Billy and those who build bridges that stay intact during natural disasters. I was so afraid that the car was going to die any second. We took the toyota cause the saturn has a tendency to overheat when it's idling and the toyota was supposed to be fixed... they replaced a defective spark plug but apparently new spark plugs have a tendency to work themselves out of the engine block or wherever they are, so we effectively drove to St. Charles on only three cylinders. Gaaah. Someone just give me a chrystler sebring convertible already.

The concert was great, thank God, and Hallie seemed genuinely happy to be there, so that part at least was fine. It wasn't worth the hassle to get there and back though. The car died twice when we finally got to move out of the parking lot after waiting for a good 45 minutes without moving an inch. I ran over a beer bottle too. Stupid litterers.

To top it off, when I got home I finally got to read some of the second book I've been reading. Amazing that I didn't read anything on my birthday except what I read before I went to bed the night before. It was so good I ended up finishing the last 30 or so pages. So I'm still tired. But the book was too good.

Thank God my grandparents are on the ball and sent me a b-day card with $20 bucks. I spent it on parking and food and a tshirt. It's finally happened though; I had a birthday where I got no presents on my b-day. Not even a card. Ah well. I know I'm loved.

file under: music , reallife Posted by Jen at 3:43 PM | Permalink MTIfCommentsActive>|

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